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"And This Song of Grief Continues to Eternity " When our exemplary of love is what went on between great Lovers of the History such as Romeo and Juliet, Leili and Majnoun, Tristan and Isolde, Farhad Kouhkan (Farhad the mountain digger), Madam ButterflyÉ no wonder we are what we are, that is some love-fearing homo sapiens. Before suggesting our reasons for such a claim, let us see if that is not what love is, what is it? What is this that went on between our exemplary of love? What happened to them all? They all either died or were left alone in the most heart-breaking way! So is this not rather sacrifice than love? Is it not dependency of Joy, even life, on another being, on another source? Is it not death of individuality, self-identity, uniqueness? (i.e. the very qualities that supposedly only homo sapiens possess and thus are counted responsible to discover and unfold them? Otherwise, what could be their difference with sheep, for example?) In one word, is it not this the Will to Death? Or is this the material, earthly form of what in Islamic Mysticism has been called Faghr (Poverty) and Fana (Dissolution), the last city of the seven cities of eshgh (Love), which is itself the second city of this complex? But why should a complex be named by its second building block? Why isn?t it called by the name of the first city, talab (longing), or the fourth one esteghna (needlessness)? Or its third one marefat (Knowledge), which is now the most useful material instrument of our survival, competing even with money and bringing with itself perhaps even more power? Why isn?t this complex called by the name of its fifth city, touhid (unity)? After all the goal of passing through these cities is dissolution in God or Universal Consciousness, is it not? Is there any other word implying worship and devotion better than touhid (unity) at least among these seven concepts? We perhaps can speculate better why the complex is not called by its sixth city, heirat (amazement). It is perhaps because although humans like to be amused and amazed by any kinds of Muses, but amazement can inspire awe and fear as well. It is as much possible to get amazed by the intensity and extent of the whole spectrum of phenomena classified as ugly, painful and thus unpleasant, as we get amazed by their complementary (commonly called opposite) forms. Thus amazement may not be that magic word that could enchant us to explore other cities of this complex; at least it can not enchant those of us that are true Homo Sapiens, that is the species possessing the faculty of Reason, Mind. (Only craze-sapiens may be enchanted by such absurd things that exclude reason, thought and as such.) Now let us look at the names of these seven cities once more and this time in the alleged sequence and then explore what might be the possible reasons for calling a complex by its second building block. The sequence is (1) Longing, (2) Love, (3) Knowledge, (4) Needlessness (that in our conditional human existence, it is perhaps more exact to call it independence or even discovery of our true self-identity), (5) Unity (but still with preservation of that self-identity, as the complete union should occur only in the last city), (6) Amazement, and (7) Poverty (perhaps meaning the process of losing this self-identity) and Dissolution (or complete loss of self-identity which using Rumi?s analogy is the return of the drop of water to the sea). Now the question is why should these cities all gather under the common name of the ?Seven Cities of Love?? Is it because this is the only one that makes this whole journey possible and gives the motivation to use that ?lion?s courage? that we all possess to dare to roam through all these strange lands and cities? Let?s see. It is rather clear that ?Longing? alone is not enough for one to pursue this goal. We can have many desires, dreams, ideals (longings), but we don?t necessarily do anything to attain them. The same can be said about the rest of them (except love of course). None of them, not even ?Knowledge? can offer that lasting motivation to pursue this goal to the end. Show me one rationalist philosopher that has found and experienced ?joyous living.? So it seems that it is only love that can act as a motivation for attainment of the rest of them. It provides the energy, enthusiasm, the zeal to accept and put up with all the pains that heading for the next cities may require. Is it not, for example, the love of knowledge that makes us to be willing to sacrifice a great deal of our time, our life for its attainment? It is sacrifice for this simple reason that we have to study for example chemistry in order to be able to study philosophy, even when we don?t like it, understand it, enjoy it and thus consider it a waste of time. The energy discharged in this process for being forced to do what we do not enjoy can be recharged only by the energy that love of philosophy offers us. On the other hand, biologically and in our species, beside knowledge which is attained with the help of another inborn faculty, that is the faculty of reason, and thus may have some survival value, love is the only one of the above concepts that has the highest indispensable survival value. It is the cause of birth, growth, and thus creativity. Therefore it is the Will to Live, to Be. That is why the conception of love presented by the greatest lovers of the history can not be love, but sacrifice and if not the perfect will to death, to non-being, at least a conditional one. Only one that loves according to the laws of nature, and under the domination of the will to live, can exist independently, moving to discover and unfold one?s individuality, self-identity, unique beauty. Love should promote not only the process of unconditional survival as long as our temporary life on this beautiful planet, the planet of Earth allows, but also the quality of life. While love in the traditional sense of the word described in the life stories of the above exemplary produces dependency and even if it does nevertheless have a survival value, it is totally conditional. It is based on the condition that the object of love should continue to live. This form of love opposes the natural will to live. It kills it. It makes it conditional, it is self-centered, it is selfish. One wants the other for one?s own sake. And see what a great battle starts in one. There is the force of survival (the will to live) pushing us forward and there is this love that turn us into some insecure fearful creature, because we are constantly sacred of losing our object of love that we now consider as important as the air we breathe, the food we eat, the rest we take, and all other vital functions of a living creature and it thus brings us to the point of standstill. So even if there could be any true love (that is in harmony with the will to live), that fear starts to eat it like termites eating through the wooden beams of the ceiling of our house of security. All the energy that even the illusion of love can offer is constantly consumed for controlling this fear, that like leprosy or cancer starts to attack the most beautiful body of our bodies, which is the body of true love and step by step as this leprosy, this cancer progresses that wonderful magical body too becomes ?uglier and uglier.? And at the end it turns us to some lonely, suffering individual among other lonely suffering individuals, moving from one illusion of love to another (which can be the love of absolutely anything, including money, power, intelligence (knowledge), compassion, wisdom, needlessness, poverty and dissolution,,,). We might at least mentally attain many of them, but deep deep down we are still in that lonely corner of ours, this time craving for uniting God, Creator, higher self, higher or cosmic consciousness, anything that religions and philosophies, or even science might call it. After all who is lonelier than the Creator? (And that is the good news for those who feel lonely. You are just sharing the ?pain? that the creator may experience! You may now use this pain to create your own creation!) But let us leave such highly enlightened individuals A-lone, and come back to our ?ordinary? level of human being-ness and ask ourselves is this leprosy really Love? Just ponder for a moment and observe all those most magnificent splendid things that this magic word brings to your mind! In one word, doesn?t it associate the Myth of Lost Heaven that we supposedly used to live in it blissfully? When we were all, that great ocean existing or not-existing prior to the emergence of Time-Space? Yang (masculine)-Yin (feminine) principles of what is now called Universe? The emergence of double helical structure of our genes? The inner Anima (female) - Animus (male) of our psyche? The man and the woman of our Personas (Egos)? According to some it is love that keeps the link between these two complementary Principles alive. (And some say it is the string of intelligence or reason). But which love? That leprosy? That termite? Was Madam Butterfly in-love? Was Farhad Kouhkan in-love? What about the Crusaders? What about those scientists or artists that devote their life to Knowledge and Art? Isn?t this devotion, and thus piety? Sacrifice? The will to death? Conditional joy? Conditional bliss? Conditional life? And conditional, not only because our whole life on this earth is conditional, but rather parasitic? Would it not be better to invent another name for it? True love, that link keeping Time-Space, Yang-Yin together should follow and be in harmony with the law of survival, that is it should flow according to the will to live. The will to joy. The will to find our self-identity, our individuality, our uniqueness, our god-ness. So far the complementary form has apparently been the exemplary and perhaps that is why we are driving this beautiful planet toward annihilation! And what a shame that it is all done under the name of Love. We love our loved ones, and we suffocate them by our fears of losing them. We love money, and we can trample on all those who prevent us from attaining the object of our love. We love our beliefs and we persecute and kill anybody who does not share our beliefs. We love our nations, so we destroy other nations that we think might be a threat. Does it mean that this song of grief is really going to continue to eternity? ********************************* Who is Roya Monajem? Like every body else as a soul in search of herself she studied medicine to learn about human body and psyche for six years, then studied, worked, wrote articles and carried out research on acupuncture therapy and Iranian herbal medicine for years. A few of her researches were published in American Journal of Acupuncture. Meanwhile translating and publishing over dozens of books that she found helpful in her own search for a "theory of health and disease" in the field of medicine, psychology, mythology, philosophy, occult and also a few novels. Participated in producing a TV serial on "man in search of equilibrium" that was banned, although it won a prize in a documentary film festival (Roshd) in Iran. She started to realize that with demystification of mysteries, the age for certain relationships such as "master-disciple" is over. Now the whole world is like a temple and one's relationships is one's best spiritual master in "knowing oneself." So she started to look for a world-view that could make one independent of the need to have a spiritual guide or master in the traditional sense of the word, and the results of this search was presented in her book Womanhood-Motherhood (http:/irannet.com/books/womanhood-) and presented workshops on the subject for about five years. She worked as a freelance translator for Payvand.com for a year or so and now has a Roya's Corner at the same site (www.payvand.com/news/Roya's Corner, where she publishes pieces on what she considers to be the major concepts of life. She has been constantly casting away her overused old limiting selves, and acting as these dead selves' mortician and grave digger as far as she remembers, as any kind of self-identity stimulates the fear of loneliness and insecurity and thus lowering the power and inclination to love "selflessly." Since her high school years in England she has been reciting Robert Frost's little poem: I am nobody, Who are you? Are you nobody too? Then that makes a pair of us! ********************************* |
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