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Understanding Disappointment, Disillusionment and DiscouragementRobert Elias Najemy A wise teacher once said, " no appointments - no disappointments". This is a part of a series of articles with questions, which will help us understand our emotions and how we can free ourselves from unwanted ones. The questions that interest us here are: 1. "What were you expecting here (from yourself, the other person, from life , from God)?" 2. "Why are you expecting that? Do you feel that you need it? Why exactly do you need yourself, others, life, or God to be that way? " 3. "What do you lose, if things are not as you expected.?" 4. "What will happen if you yourself do not live up to your expectations?" 5. "Whose expectations are these? Do they remind you of anything you heard as a child?" 6. " Can you think of a way to internally create what you need even when you or others cannot be what you expected?" 7. "Can you accept that you, others and all of creation are in a process of evolution, and thus, while it is useful to have the image of how you want us all to be, that it is also useful to have patience concerning the gradual manifestation of those ideals?" 8. Which beliefs do you need to change in order to feel safe and or worthy when you and/or others cannot live up to your expectations? 9. "Which beliefs do you need to change, and/or actions do you need to take, so as to more actively insure that you and / or others are more dedicated to fulfilling you expectations?" 10. "Have you clearly communicated to the others what you expect of them and why you need that from them and how you feel when they do not give this to you?" 11. What would you like to communicate to those with whom you feel disappointed? Now you may like to describe how you would like to think, feel and respond in future situations. You may find it more powerful to write your description in the present tense as if it is already a reality. For more on dealing with emotions you might want to check out these sources: http://www.holisticharmony.com/eft/index.asp http://www.holisticharmony.com/ezines/index.asp http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/research/emotions.html http://www.emofree.com If we care for our bodies and minds, |
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