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Robert Elias Najemy a. By manifesting what we want - creating the reality we desire. b. By learning to be happy with what we have ? with our present reality - until we can create an even more positive reality. We effectively manifest our goals with these 8 steps. 1. Clarify goals 2. Set Intention (consciously and subconsciously) 3. Determine Actions and "sacrifices of love" 4. Remove inner obstacles 5. Employ efforts and program 6. Perseverance 7. Patience 8. Detachment from result ****************************************** 1. Determining and Clarifying our goals ****************************************** a. We start by making a list of our goals. What we would like to accomplish in the near and far future ? before we leave these bodies? We might be talking about any goals on any level. Some examples might be: Health Lose weight A harmonious love relationship Financial security Abundance on all levels Professional advancement Professional satisfaction Greater effectiveness in dealing with clients Better relationship with time. Able to be more assertive with others Greater Athletic achievement Greater success with the opposite sex Dietary discipline Increased creative ability Learn to dance (pai t, write, act etc.) Learn a musical instrument Learn a language Public speaking ability To be able to be totally honest with self and others To be able to be myself in all (specific) situations Better grades at school Learn to fly a plane Travel around the world (or to a specific place) More effective communication with _______ Be able to Love ____ as he/she is Overcome the pain of the loss of a loved one. Overcome attachments and or fears. Greater Concentration Better Memory Emotional maturity Greater Self-acceptance Greater Self-confidence Mental development Thought-free meditation Happiness in all situations Inner Peace regardless of external events Selfless Love for all Moral contentment Many other possibilities ________________________________________________ Please take time to choose a goal of your own or inner potential that you want to manifest. Some of my present goals (inner potentials that I would like to manifest) are: 1. _____________________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________________ 3. _____________________________________________________________ 4. ____________________________________________________________ The first goal I would like to work on is: _____________________________ b. Then we will want to understand why we want to manifest these goals or inner potentials. This helps us clarify why this goal is important. 1. What do we believe we will get or feel when we succeed? (What is the need behind the need?) (Happiness, satisfaction, self-worth, acceptance, recognition, peace, security, money, freedom, satisfy parents) Why do we want, need or desire to do this? When I have manifested this goal (inner potential) I (believe I) will now have: c. Greater financial security d. Higher self-worth e. More acceptance/recognition from others f. Greater freedom g. Satisfaction h. Inner peace i. Long term Happiness j. Greater Self-actualization k. Moral satisfaction l. Inner fulfillment m. My parents¢ recognition n. Other _______________________ The most important of the above for me are: ________________________________ Sometimes the goal may not be ours ? but for our parents or for society ? spouse. 2. Is this goal for me or for others? Is it a childhood programming? 3. Is this goal worth ursuing ? as a process ? even if the results are not what I imagine or would like? Is this ideal important enough for me to make the effort ? not matter what happens? 4. Is this goal moving towards something or running away from something? If you have any doubts about this, you may want to answer the following questions. ****************************************** Deciding on Life Purpose ****************************************** BR> Questions Which Help us Connect with our Inner Guidance 1. When I was a child the things (activities, hobbies, interests, ideals) which were most important to me at various ages were: a. before 9 years old b. between 9 and 12 c. 13 to 15 d. 15 to 18 e. 19 to 21 f. 21 to 25 2. If I were told that I would die in 5 years, and that I would be healthy and active until that moment, I would live my life in the following way a. family b. work c. personal time 3. If I had to give three messages to the people of the world which for me were the most important guidelines for them to live by they would be. 4. If I had three wishes from a genie, who could give me special powers, what powers would I ask for: a. If they were for my self? b. If they were to be used for others? 5. Describe here exactly how you would like your life to be, if there were no limitations whatsoever. Remember to describe all aspects of your life: physical, mental, social, professional, family, personal, spiritual, etc. 6. If your children asked you why we live, why we are on this planet, what is the purpose of life, what should be their goals in this life, how would you answer them? 7. What are your talents, and abilities which come naturally to you, which are inherent in your personality? 8. When are the moments, in which situations, have you felt the greatest satisfaction, fulfillment or sense of comfort with your self and the world around you. 9. What kinds of activities or situations bring you the greatest joy? 10. What is it that you think you are best equipped to offer to your fellow man? 11. What talents, abilities or character traits would you like to develop further at this point in your life. 12. If in fact you are an instrument of a higher universal power (consciousness) which is governing all activities on the earth, seeking to manifest its latent potential in physical reality, through all beings as physical instruments of its expression, what could be the roles which you (as one of those physical instruments) have incarnated to play in the cosmic drama? ****************************************** 2. Set Intention (consciously and subconsciously) ****************************************** Intention and Concentration on our goals means that we focus on them clearly and intensely (Without anxiety but with confidence that we will manifest them) and direct our energy, time, money and intelligence towards them. a. Daily positive visualization of ourselves having already achieved the goal will direct our energies in that direction. b. We can use our goal as a frame of reference in order to make decisions as to how to spend our time, money and energy. Every time we need to make a decision, we ask, «will this enhance or inhibit my progress. ****************************************** 3. Determine Actions and "Sacrifices of Love" ****************************************** Determine the actions needed to take to move towards goal: a. Actions we need to take ? efforts we will make. b. What we will need to «sacrifice with love». a. What actions will I need to take in order to achieve this goal or manifest this inner potential? Consider: 1. Study 2. Take courses 3. Develop discipline 4. Communicate with ____ 5. Come into contact with people or situations that I would prefer not to. 6. Make an effort 7. Work hard 8. Wake up early 9. Work extra hours 10. Overcome fears 11. Overcome attachments 12. Travel 13. Forgive 14. Be honest with self and others 15. Confront ______ 16. Learn new concepts and techniques 17. Give much time 18. Exercise daily 19. Admit faults - mistakes Other ____________________ b. What might I have to «sacrifice with love?» (Have less of in order to have the time, money and energy to manifest this goal? Consider: 1. Less food 2. Less time for recreation, TV. 3. Less rest or sleep 4. Less of some specific activity _____ . 5. Less money for other needs. 6. Less social life 7. Giving up cigarettes, alcohol - other pleasures Other ****************************************** 4. Remove inner obstacles ****************************************** We then need to remove any inner obstacles with Energy Psychology (http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/eft/index.asp) or other techniques for overcoming all internal and external obstacles. Our abilities, power, virtues, qualities. talents and inner potentials are all natural inner qualities waiting for manifestation. They are not so much developed as they are revealed from within. An analogy would be an «inner lake» full of various qualities and abilities that are all ready to flow outward and manifest in our daily lives. But there are certain obstacles that prevent this flow. Our job is to remove these obstacles so that the innate wisdom and power can freely flow. We then identify the following categories of «obstructing emotions» that can be removed with Energy Psychology or any other means. a. Feelings about not having yet succeeded. We might feel guilt, shame, disappointment, disillusionment, self-rejection or anger at ourselves or others who might be «responsible». Perhaps we feel that it is not worth trying any more. Such feelings can cause so much energy to be lost in negativity that not enough actually moves towards making the necessary changes. b. Feelings we have about making the effort. 1. What do we need to do? (Exercising, studying, traveling, speaking to others, classes, seminars, exerting self - as mentioned above). We might feel suppressed, fear that the effort will be too tiring, or that we will loose our freedom or that we might fail. 2. What might need to give up, (food, freedom, cigarettes, drinking, rest, vacations, time with friends, Television, sleeping late) We might fear feeling suppressed, unhappy, losing our freedom, tense etc. c. Feelings about succeeding ? We may feel that we are not worthy of such success, or that when we actually do achieve that goal, we will have to give up something else important to us. We might fear that: a. I do not deserve to have it or fulfil this goal b. I cannot have or manifest this goal. c. I am in some type of danger if I fulfill this goal. d. I am not capable of fulfilling this goal. e. Others do not want me to have or fulfill it. I do not want to hurt them or come into conflict with them. f. I will lose others 2; love if I succeed or fulfill this goal. g. I will not be a spiritual person if I have this or fulfill this goal. h. I will feel guilty if I have this or fulfill this goal. i. I will harm others if I fulfill this goal. j. I am guilty and not worthy and I should not have or fulfill this goal. k. Since I have not been able to have it until now, then I will not be able to fulfill this goal. l. I will lose my freedom if I fulfill this goal. m. I might have to sacrifice some source of security in order to fulfill this goal. n. I might give satisfaction to others - something which I do not want to do. o. The others might cease feeling guilty about me. p. I might lose my control over others. q. My other desires will be unfulfilled if I have or fulfill this goal. r. The effort to achieve this goal will be painful or unpleasant. s. I do not have the necessary discipline to manifest this goal. t. Other _________________________________________________________ (This subject is discussed in detail Free to be Happy with Energy Psychology. http://HolisticHarmony.com) ****************************************** A technique for discovering obstacles ****************************************** 1. A good way to discover our specific obstacles is to do a relaxation technique and: a. Think about the fact that we have not yet achieved our goal and discover how we feel about not having done so yet. If we find that we have negative emotions about not having succeeded yet, we will need to employ EFT or other methods in order to be free from them. b. Then, we imagine ourselves making the effort towards that goal and see how we feel about making that effort. (Do we enjoy it, or do we feel suppressed, fearful or discouraged? Do we feel that it is in vain to make this effort ? because we will never ucceed?) If we find we have resistance towards this effort, then we will need to free ourselves from the emotions and beliefs that make the effort itself difficult or unpleasant. c. Now, we imagine ourselves having succeeded in this effort and see how we feel now that this is not an issue any more. ****************************************** 5. Employ Efforts and Program ****************************************** Now we consciously direct our energy towards our goal. We willingly, intelligently and lovingly sacrifice other possibly conflicting needs in order to achieve our goals. ****************************************** 6. Perseverance ? ****************************************** We persevere in our efforts towards those goals and towards removing all obstacles. We give our energy daily until we are satisfied with the results. ****************************************** 7. Patience ****************************************** We are patient for the results to come. This is important so as not to give up. ****************************************** 8. Detachment from result ? and from identifying self-worth with result ? ****************************************** We detach ourselves from the results of our efforts and have faith that the result will be whatever is best or our evolutionary process. Sometimes we need to accept not having and experience self-worth, security and happiness without, before the way if free to manifest what we want. Also anxiety about the results often distracts our focus on our best effort. For more information about how to remove obstacles with EFT, go to: http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/eft/index.asp ****************************************** Robert Elias Najemy, a life coach with 30 years of experience, has trained over 300 Life coaches and now does so over the Internet. Info at: http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/introholisticcoach.asp He is the author of over 20 books, 600 articles and 400 lecture cassettes on Human Harmony. Download FREE 100's of articles, find wonderful ebooks, guidance and teleclasses at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com. His books The Psychology of Happiness and Remove Pain with Energy Psychology are available at http://www.amazon.com ****************************************** May you be well on all levels of your Being. Be Well**********Return to index of shorter articles ********** "The Psychology of Happiness"by Robert Najemy is available at Amazon.com at:Amazon.com Or you can get it at a 40% discount atThe Psychology of Happiness with 40% discountView OnlyView The Psychology of Happiness********* Membership is free and you can access 600 articles, chapters and ebooks for free.Become a Member********* Our Free ezine Claritygreater health, happiness and harmonious relationships. 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