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 Sample Chapters from You will then be directed back to our «thank you» page where you will be able to download the ebook in one of three ways. 1. My left-clicking on the link for the ebook on the «thank you» page, that will appear once you make your clickbank payment. This will cause the ebook to gradually appear on your screen as a pdf file that is read by Acrobat Reader. Then you can just save the pdf file on your computer. Your download will be instantaneous. It make take some time to appear perhaps 5 to 20 minutes to appear depending on your internet speed. 2. The second way is to right click on the link mentioned above on the thank you page and this will cause the pdf file to download to your computer. Your download will start immediately but may take some time perhaps 5 to 20 minutes to download depending on your internet speed. 3. The third way is to send us an email to ren@holisticharmony.com with the subject "Please send me my ebook". Be sure that your purchase number and the title of the ebook is mentioned in the email. We will then send you an email with the pdf file of the book as an attachment. This should arrive within 24 hours. We are sure that this book will be extremely interesting and beneficial for you as it has been for many thousands of others. Only $ 10 U.S. - Why so cheap? All of these ebooks are full of vital information, concepts, guidelines, examples, techniques and helpful hints. Robert has purposely asked that they be sold for prices that all can afford so that all can benefit from them. To order, now click on the link below to be taken to clickbank Conveniently Purchase the "Free to be Happy" ebook through ClickBank Return to list of books ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This book will change your life. You can free yourself quickly and simply of fears, pain, anger, sorrow physical pain and even addictions. Free yourself now with this incredibly simply technique. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Free to be Happy Why this title and what does it mean? We all seek happiness and yet it eludes us. Throughout the history of humanity, men and women have sought to discover and share with others effective solutions for human suffering and other limitations to our manifestation of our unlimited inner happiness, peace, love, creativity, productivity and harmony. All religious, philosophical and psychological systems seek that same goal. We could also call this book. Free to be Peaceful. Free to Love Unconditionally Free to be Creative Free to Solve your Problems Free to be Healthy Free to Manifest your Unlimited Potential Free to Realize your Spiritual Self Finally Dr. Roger Callahan has discovered a method which enables all of this. One of his students, Gary Craig, has simplified Dr. Callahan?s discovery so that more can benefit from it. This book deals with how to employ that new discovery in all aspects of your life and for all of your important issues. It is a great gift to yourself and for your friends and family. We are presenting you here the: 1. Table of Contents 2. Sample Chapters from this book So that you can decide whether you are interested in purchasing it. When you are ready hit your back button and order. Click below to be taken directly to the samples: v Free to be Happy v Table of Contents v What is EFT? v How to employ EFT v Case Histories and a Study in Aspects in EFT - Cyprus v Case Histories and a Study in Aspects in EFT - Greece v Overcoming Fear v Health Issues v >A Unifying Theory ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Table of Contents Free to be Happy ... 6 Credentials and Legal Statement ...7 Introduction ... 8 1. What is EFT? ... 10 2. How to employ EFT .. 14 Points to tap on É 19 EFT - Flow Diagram ... 20 Reminder of the Process É 24 Acupuncture Points É 29 EFT flow Diagram É 30 EFT Process Worksheet É 31 3. The Stages of Employing EFT ... 32 4. Methodology and Modifications ... 34 5. Working with Aspects of Emotions with EFT ... 38 6. Uses of EFT and Dealing with Aspects ... 42 7. Case Histories and a Study in Aspects in EFT -1 ... 49 8. Case Histories and a Study in Aspects in EFT - 2 ... 55 9. Overcoming Fear ... 66 10. EFT and Health Issues ... 70 11. Uses of EFT and Dealing with Addictions ... 74 12. Working on Goals with EFT ... 79 13. EFT and Self-esteem ... 84 14. EFT & Opening to Love ... 90 15. Using E.F.T. to Aid the Process of Forgiveness ... 96 16. EFT & Romantic Rejection ... 101 17. EFT and Coping with the Departure of Loved Ones ... 107 18. EFT and Codependency ... 115 19. EFT & Dealing with Victims ... 124 20. EFT & Dealing with Aloof Persons ... 132 21. EFT & Dealing with Interrogators ... 137 22. EFT & Dealing with Intimidators ... 141 23. EFT and Obstacles to Communication ... 145 24. EFT and Obstacles to Harmonious Love Relationships ... 152 25. Healing Childhood Experiences with EFT ... 156 26. EFT for Inner Conflicts ... 166 27. EFT & Finding our Life Purpose ... 176 28. EFT for Meditation and Prayer ... 184 29. EFT & the Impending Departure from the Physical Body ... 187 30. A Unifying Theory ... 198 Epilogue ... 122 To Index ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter one What is EFT? EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques and is one of a number of energy-based psychological or psychotherapeutic methods based on the regulation and harmonization of the human energy system while we are focused on a certain ordinarily disturbing thought. Its founder Gary Craig, previously a civil engineer, has been dedicated for many years to helping people live happier lives. He learned the basics of this method from his teacher Dr. Roger Callahan. In 1980 Dr. Roger Callahan, a dedicated psychologist, after many years of relentless empirical and intuitive searching for more effective ways to relieve his clients of their problems, made an incredible discovery which will forever change the nature of psychology and physical and mental therapy. A Leap in Perception This discovery is such a quantum jump in our perception of the nature of mental and physical illness that some professionals cannot yet embrace it because of their inability to let go of previous conceptions. Until recently, I was one of those who could not embrace it. Around 15 years ago I first saw Dr. Callahan?s Love Pain video where he demonstrated his healing technique in which through a tapping procedure people overcame the pain they felt upon of the loss of loved ones. I observed that truly the people seemed to feel better. But I put the video on the shelf for 15 years, even though I have been working with people?s problems daily all these years. Understanding EFT My training is as a chemical engineer. After two years of working for Uniroyal Chemical, I decided that I would prefer to work with people rather than machines and chemicals. I have dedicated the last 35 years of my life to researching and employing techniques for enhancing human harmony on all levels; physical, emotional, mental, social, professional and spiritual. I have then shared these techniques with others through books, lectures and seminars. Because of my training as an engineer I feel the need to understand the mechanisms behind whatever I do. They have to fit into my perception of reality as a human being. I could not understand what I saw on that first video. Additionally, I need to try out whatever I do on myself first. I often thought of trying out the Love Pain video on others, but felt that I would look foolish and so I left it on the shelf. About a year ago, a dear friend of mine said that she would be interested in taking a course in energy psychology at a university. I immediately recalled that old video and we watched it together. A New World of Possibilities From that day, I have been employing it on myself and hundreds of others in seminars and counseling sessions. A whole new world of possibilities has opened up to me. I am so deeply grateful to Dr. Callahan and his student Gary Craig for bringing this new information to the public. Before EFT, I often felt discouraged when working with people because even though I was offering a combination of the best (in my perception) of what existed, I was not satisfied with the results. (In our seminars and personal appointments we use Active Listening, Psychoanalysis, Cognitive therapy, Journaling, Behavioral Therapy, EMDR, Childhood regressions, Gestalt Dialoguing, Body Centered Psychology, Rebirthing, Catharsis work, spiritual healing and various teachings. Some of our seminars meet once a week for six years.) I still feel that all of the above are beneficial, but none of them compares with TFT or EFT for actually liberating a person from his or her problem. I am so happy that I now have a tool that I know will work, and that is so simple that it can be taught to others. Instant Cures Interestingly enough, Dr. Callahan actually went through an economic crisis some years after his discovery because he actually cured his patients in one or two sessions and did not have to see them over and over. Neither would people say, "look this is something which previously would have taken 20 visits, so please let me pay you accordingly." Additionally, it is probable that many of those problems would not have been cured at all with other methods. This indicates the effectiveness of this system. How does it work ? For a more detailed analysis of how this discovery was made you can refer to Dr. Callahan?s site (http://www.tftrx.com) or Gary Craig?s site (http://www.emofree.com) where you can order their books and videos. I will give my own interpretation or "unifying theory" of why this works in a later chapter. In 1980, Dr. Callahan had a patient, Mary, (they have both appeared on national TV a number of times to tell this story) who had an extreme fear of water. She could not even watch it on TV and was afraid when it rained. They had been working on this problem for a year and had come to the point of getting Mary to Dr. Callahanãs home to sit far from the pool and analyze what she was feeling and how she could overcome this. According to Dr. Callahan, their only accomplishment was that Mary discovered that she could withstand much more pain than she knew. She never stopped feeling intense fear. One day she was suffering intensely because of her presence near the water and she also mentioned that her abdominal area was hurting her. (A natural reaction when we feel fear). That was a crucial moment in history, because Dr. Callahan remembered that there was an acupuncture point for the stomach meridian just on the cheekbone and he asked her to tap there. She tapped only a few times and looked up and said, "it?s gone". Dr. Callahan had no idea what she meant and what was happening. Not only was her stomach pain gone but also her fear. She got up and approached the pool with no fear whatsoever. Today her fear is still gone! What could not be accomplished by a year of weekly psychotherapy meetings with one of the most accomplished psychologists in the country was achieved in less that 30 seconds by tapping on the cheek bone. Dr. Callahan did not know how to interpret and integrate what had happened. It took him a number of years and dedicated research to gradually create the most powerful therapeutic tool known. For details of that process you can refer to his books, cassettes, videos and courses. S0 what is this system? It is simple. 1. We focus on the thought (stimulus, emotion or physical phenomenon) which brings forth the unpleasant emotional or physical problem such as fear, hurt, anger, guilt or some physical pain. 2. We measure how intense our feeling or pain is from 0 - 10. This is called the SUD (Subjective Units of Disturbance). Zero means no disturbance at all. Ten means we are feeling the maximum intensity we can imagine. (Considering our present frame of reference.) 3. Then we tap on certain acupuncture points on the face, chest and hands. (There are also other aspects to this procedure we will explain later.) Tapping on the acupuncture points initiates the flow of energy through the energy channels or meridians, thus correcting the disturbance in the energy field associated with that problem. 4. Then we again check our SUD or intensity of feeling. If it has not gone to 1 or zero then we tap on these points again. 5. We keep doing this tapping, checking how we feel, until the problem disappears. That is basically all there is to it. Employing it, however, requires more detailed knowledge of what to do. This will be covered in this book. The concept is that when we are focused on the particular thought which bothers us, then the particular disturbed energy pattern ("perturbation" according to Dr Callahan or "disruption in the body?s energy system" according to Gary Graig) associated with this thought is present and predominant in our body?s energy system. This creates our emotional and physical state. Gary?s explanation is: "The cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body?s energy system." When we tap on these acupuncture points, we are affecting and releasing the flow in that field and thus removing the blockages and disturbances which were creating the emotion and/or physical problem. Sometimes this correction is only temporary, but usually it is permanent. EFT or TFT ? If Dr. Callahan is the founder, why are we studying his student?s, Gary Craig?s, system and not Dr. Callahan?s? They are basically the same system. The differences are slight. Sequence: 1. Dr. Callahan believes that it is essential to tap on certain points in a specific order which are determined by his diagnostic testing approach using arm strength testing or "Voice Technology" (Both are beyond the scope of this book). 2. Gary Craig has found that he can get the same results by tapping on 12 specific points while focusing on the disturbing thought or physical problem. This way is much simpler and does not require that you to be tested. 100 % Overhaul Gary?s system, which is a general (100%) overhaul of the energy system, also automatically corrects for possible Psychological Reversal - a type of inner resistance (electrical and psychological) towards improvement, whether it exists or not. Otherwise we would have to test for this, something that is difficult for those untrained in the field. In the case that there actually was no inner resistance, correcting for it does not create it. Thus there is no reason not to do it. It takes less time to correct it than check for it. Lastly, Dr. Callahan has ceased using affirmations with his tapping procedure, while they still play an important role in Gary?s general overhaul. I have great respect and gratitude for Dr. Callahan and believe that professionals working with serious psychological problems would definitely benefit from his techniques. I am, however, basically working with people with average psychological problems and those seeking self-improvement. Therefore, I have chosen to work with Emotional Freedom Techniques, a simpler adaptation of Dr. Callahan?s Thought Field Therapy, because others can learn and apply to themselves. Having said this, let us now move on to how to employ EFT. (For a more detailed theory of why and how this works see chapter on a Unifying Theory) To Index ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter two How to employ EFT I will describe here the procedure for EFT as it is taught by Gary Craig in "The Manual" to be found on his site www.emofree.com. I would suggest that you download it, read it and if interested, order his video course. So what I am going to present you here is basically Gary Craig?s EFT which is a modification of Dr. Callahan?s Thought Field Therapy (TFT). In a later chapter I will explain some minor alterations we have created in our employment here in the Center for Holistic Harmony. (www.HolisticHarmony.com) Note about employing EFT on others: Although theoretically anyone could share this with another, my personal feeling is that this may not be a good idea in some cases. Some people have much pent up pain and fear and tapping in some cases can bring this up to the surface creating situations which require the expertise of a professional experienced in dealing with emotional crises. This may happen in only 10 % of the cases, but I think that this is high enough of a possibility for people who want to work on serious problems to do so with the guidance of an experienced professional. The professional need not be trained in EFT but should be familiar with how to deal with emotions, which might surface. Many EFT practitioners are also doctors or psychotherapists On the other hand, people all over the world are learning EFT and employing it on themselves with wonderful results. My perception is that participating in a weekend seminar on EFT and learning all the details is not the same as being told by a friend to just tap on some points. As with all techniques, it is better to become extremely proficient in this method before you start sharing it with others. Those interested in becoming EFT practitioners in order to help others can do so through www.emofree.com. The Round We will refer to the whole procedure as one round. Each round consists of four steps. The second and fourth steps are the same. Step 1. The Setup a. We bring to mind the emotion or physical problem we want to free ourselves from, by correcting the energy flow associated with that disturbed energy field. b. We estimate the SUD or subjective units of discomfort (or disturbance) from 0 to 10, where zero means no discomfort, emotion or pain whatsoever and ten means the highest we can imagine. If working alone it might be good to write this down so you can remember how disturbed you were at the start. If employing this on someone else, you also may want to write this down so as to follow the procedure and remember where you are. c. Now we correct for psychological reversal just in case it is present. Some people have an inner resistance to getting well. Whatever approach they employ, it just doesn?t work for them. These persons might have subconscious beliefs, needs or fears, which are preventing improvement. We would suspect that they have some subconscious "benefit" or "protection" from not achieving the improvement they are consciously seeking. I would agree with this concept. Dr. Callahan has hypothesized that there is actually a reversal in the polarity of the body?s energy field, which prevents the correction from taking place when employing TFT, EFT or any other healing technique for that matter. Gary uses the example of a battery being placed with the wrong polarity in a cassette player. It will simply not work, whatever we do. Thus, if there is psychological reversal, our tapping will not be able to correct the disturbed energy field. This became very obvious to Dr. Callahan when he learned "arm testing" which shows how our thoughts affect our energy field. When he purposely thought positive thoughts his arm was strong. When he thought disturbing thoughts, his arm went weak. This is also the case for truth and lies. When we speak the truth, our arm becomes strong to external resistance. (Someone pushing down on it.) When we say something in contradiction with our inner feelings or truth, then our extended arm loses strength against someone pushing down on it. We can also check out the effect of food substances on our energy field in this way. He was working with a woman who was coming to him for help to lose weight. After some time, when she was not getting any results, he asked her to hold out her arm and he pushed on it to test its strength. He then asked her to say, "I want to lose weight." When she said this, her arm became weaker against his pressure. He then asked her to say, "I do not want to lose weight." When she said this, her arm became stronger. This indicated that in truth she did not actually want to lose weight. This was his first realization of the existence of psychological reversal in the energy field. Thus, in some cases, we have an energy or psychological reversal as it is called in TFT and EFT, which needs to be corrected in order to get the results we want. According to Gary?s experience, about 40% of us have psychological reversal on some issues. Fewer have a general reversal on most of their life issues. These people usually are those who have depression, serious diseases and / or addictions to self-sabotaging substances such as drugs, alcohol, cigarettes etc. We will discuss this further. Some of us have a subconscious tendency to undermine our own efforts perhaps because we believe we do not deserve a better reality or we fear success for some reason. In Gary?s 100% overhaul we correct for any possible psychological reversal just in case. We lose nothing, because if there was no reversal, then we have simply spent less than 30 seconds correcting for something, which wasn?t there. It does not create reversal if there was none to begin with. How do we correct for psychological reversal? There are basically four ways. 1. The simplest is to tap on the side of the hand at the point on the hand where we would hit a piece of wood if we were hitting it with a karate chop. (Doesn?t matter which hand). (In Dr. Callahan?s TFT, there is no need to saying anything while tapping.) In EFT, while tapping, we repeat the setup phrase, which could be something like this: a.1. Even though I have this (fill in your emotion) _______, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself. a.2. I love and accept myself even though I have this (fill in your emotion) _______. a.3. Even though I have this (fill in your emotion) _______, I love and accept myself exactly as I am. You can formulate your own phrase as long as it contains these two aspects: * Recognition or acknowledgment of what you feel. * Acceptance and love of yourself even with what you feel. We will give other examples of the setup phrases for psychological reversal throughout the book. 2. The second method is to repeat these same affirmations as we rub the "sore spot". This is on the side of the chest approximately 3 inches down and 3 inches to the right or left of the hollow spot at the top of the sternum, in the center of the chest. (See the diagram.) We should rub with circular movements pushing inwards rubbing the skin over the bones and muscles, not rubbing our fingers over the skin or clothing. We will present you a modification of this setup procedure in a future chapter. These are the two basic methods of removing psychological reversal; repeating the setup phrase as we either tap on the side of the hand or rub the sore spot. It does not matter on which side of the body we tap or rub. We can also change. 3. Dr. Callahan has discovered that in some cases the Bach Flower "Rescue Remedy" can correct for psychological reversal. Four drops under the tongue or with a glass of water should do. 4. There is a fourth method also discovered by Dr. Callahan, which will be explained later, which is called "Collarbone Breathing". As this procedure is more time consuming (about two to four minutes) it is used when we have tried all other forms of correcting psychological reversal and still are not getting the results we would like. So this is step one. We: * Focus on the thought, which causes our disturbance. * Estimate the SUD or degree of discomfort. * Correct for possible psychological reversal. Step 2: The Tapping Sequence We are now ready to tap on the twelve points so as to remove the disturbance in the energy field. These points are usually the beginning or end points of the acupuncture meridians (energy channels) and can be seen on the accompanying diagram. We tap on them about seven times each in this sequence. It really does not matter how many times you tap. It should however be more than five. This initiates the flow of energy through these energy channels, thus correcting the disturbance in the energy field associated with that problem. There are many ways to tap which different people find suitable as they work with EFT. In general, however, tapping should have a good pace - not too slow - and with an abrupt percussive hit on each tap. But never painful or in anyway damaging. One hypothesis is that we are creating, by tapping, a piezoelectric impulse, which causes the energy to flow throughout the meridians. We tap with the tips of the index and middle finger of either hand. The area covered by these two fingers is larger than the area of the points themselves and gives us a safety factor of hitting on the point when we tap. We could even switch hands while tapping, if one gets tired. Reminder Phrase As we tap at each point, we can verbally, or perhaps mentally in cases where we do not want to be heard, repeat the "reminder phrase". The reminder phrase is simply a declaration of which energy field we are tapping on. This helps us to be focused on this particular energy field as we tap, correcting this particular field with our tapping. Thus the reminder phrase will mention the emotion or physical problem we are tapping for and perhaps also the stimulus for that. For example: Fear of heights. Fear of speaking in front of others Fear of being abandoned Anger when they correct me. Pain in the lower back. Anxiety about this test. The more specific the phrase the better. We could just say: This fear Anger Anxiety Pain But then the tapping would be addressed to a much larger and more complicated energy field made up of many various types of fears, anger, anxiety or pain. If we employ daily a number of rounds on this general issue for weeks, we will eventually have results. In many cases, however, as we are tapping for a general emotion or issue, we will become aware of specific problems, which will arise to be worked on. This is the beauty of EFT. When we work on any particular desired state such as freedom from fear, anxiety, pain or anger, it will bring into our thought field the various specific obstacles towards that goal. We work specifically on those particular obstacles and gradually remove all the "bars" to our freedom. This will be understood more clearly further on. We repeat the reminder phrase one time for each point that we tap. We tap a number of times (say about seven) while we repeat this phrase verbally or mentally. In the case of physical problems it may be simpler just to close our eyes and focus on the part of the body where the phenomena (such as pain) we are tapping for is centered. We tap on only one energy field It is extremely important that we focus on only one energy field when we work. We should not focus on more than one emotion or problem. This will bring forth two different sets of data into the energy field that we are tapping on and will prevent us from having results. I would like to make a personal observation concerning confused energy fields. When I was first employing EFT, I noticed that whenever I focused on an emotion I wanted to work with, my mind would, out of habit, bring forth an intellectual construct as to why I need not feel this way. I had been working for so many years with bringing positive thoughts to mind that this was happening automatically. These positive thoughts, however, always existed parallel to the negative emotions. They actually never replaced them. Now, while doing EFT, the automatically appearing positive thought was creating interference in the energy field of the emotion I was tapping for. I made an effort to stop this tendency of bringing the positive to the mind. This allowed the negative emotion to be the only energy field present while tapping and thus the tapping was more effective. After some rounds of EFT, resulting in the lowering of the SUD, the positive perception appears by itself now without the negative feeling. For this reason, when the level of discomfort (SUD) is lowered, we can introduce the positive alternative perceptions. The points Refer to the accompanying diagram to see where the points are located. We are also mentioning, for those interested, the acupuncture meridians and the numbers of the points where we tap. It is not necessary to know or understand these. I personally am not proficient in this science. We usually tap in this sequence: 1. The corner of the eyebrow where it unites with the bridge of the nose. Referred to as EB Eyebrow point. (Bladder Meridian 2) 2. The side of the eye on the temple. SE - side of eye. (Gall Bladder 1) 3. Under the eye at the lower part of the bone. UE - under eye. (Stomach Meridian 2) 4. Under the nose and above the lip. UN - under nose (Governing Vessel Meridian 25 - 26) 5. Under the lower lip and above the chin. Ch ? chin (Conception Vessel Meridian 24) 6. Under the armpit on the side of the body approximately level with the nipples. UA - under arm (Spleen Meridian 21) This is a slight modification of Gary?s series (remember according to Gary it does not matter in which series we tap). This will be explained later. 7. Under the collarbone and directly to the left or right of the sternum. This is in the soft spot just below the collarbone (the highest horizontal bone on the front of the body) and to the side of the sternum (the vertical bone in the center of the chest) CB - collarbone point. (Kidney Meridian 27) This point is not to be confused with the sore spot where we rub in order to correct psychological reversal. The sore spot is further from the center and lower than the collarbone point. 8. On the outside of the thumb at the point where the nail unites with the skin. (If you place your palms on your abdomen, the part you tap on will be turned up towards your head.) Th - Thumb point. (Lung Meridian 11) 9. On the outside of the index finger at the point where the nail unites with the skin. (If you place your palms on your abdomen, the part you tap on will be turned up towards your head.) IF - index finger. (Large Intestine Meridian 1) 10. On the outside of the middle finger at the point where the nail unites with the skin. (If you place your palms on your abdomen, the part you tap on will be turned up towards your head.) MF - middle finger. (Circulation - sex Meridian 9) 11. On the outside of the little finger at the point where the nail unites with the skin. (If you place your palms on your abdomen, the part you tap on will be turned up towards your head.) BF - baby finger. (Heart Meridian 9) 12. On the side of the hand where you would hit a piece of wood if doing karate. KC - karate chop point. (Small Intestine Meridian 3-4) This is the same point we tapped on while correcting for psychological reversal. So, in step 2 we tap around seven times on each of the twelve points as we repeat the reminder phrase once at each point. Except for the Under the Nose and Chin points all of the rest are located on the right and left sides of the body. It does not matter whether you tap on the left or right. You could even change sides in the middle of a tapping sequence. Although there is theoretically no benefit in tapping in a balanced way on right and left, my many years of yoga, which demands balance, cause me to prefer it. There is no disadvantage and some people seem to find it more effective. Also if you do a lot of tapping with one hand, it might get tired. I personally choose to switch sides and hands. In general, however, EFT is done by tapping with the dominant hand on either side of the body. Step 3 - The Gamut Series This is the strangest part of the procedure. Some people feel silly when they first perform it. It, however, plays the role of balancing the energies and the activity of the right and left hemisphere of the brain between tapping sequences. It is made up nine movements which we do as we tap rapidly on the gamut point (see diagram) which is located on either hand in the groove created by the bones leading from the wrist to the knuckles of the smallest two fingers (ring finger and little finger). The tapping is done in the groove towards the knuckles. (Thyroid 3) As we tap around three to five times a second, we make the following movements and procedure. 1. We close our eyes. 2. We open them. 3. Keeping the head straight, we look hard down right. 4. Keeping the head straight, we look hard down left. 5. Keeping the head straight, we make circles with the eyes to the right. 6. Keeping the head straight, we make circles with the eyes to the left. 7. We hum a few bars of any song (Gary likes "Happy Birthday") (two to five seconds) 8. We count from one to five out loud (unless you do not want to be heard) 9. We hum a few bars of any tune again. (Two to five seconds) This may seem silly, but it does help to balance the energies. When we hum and count and hum, we activate the two hemisphere of the brain. Having completed the step three - the Gamut Series, we are now ready for step four. Step four - The sequence again. Step four is the same as step two. We go through all the twelve points tapping around seven times at each point as we repeat the reminder phrase. This completes one round. Evaluating the SUD We now focus on the thought, emotion, desire or physical problem, which was disturbing us, and evaluate where our SUD (our degree of disturbance) is. We seek to determine whether it has: a. Risen? (It can sometimes - but seldom) b. Stayed the same? c. Dropped? (Which means we feel less disturbed when we focus on this.) When the SUD Does Not Go Down If it has risen or stayed the same, then we perform the next round exactly as the previous. Having now measured our present SUD, we perform: 1. The set up; rubbing or tapping with the appropriate corrective phrases for possible psychological reversal (this is even more important now, because, as the discomfort has not subsided at all, there is greater possibility of the presence of psychological reversal). 2.The sequence tapping the twelve points repeating the reminder phrase. 3. The gamut series 4. The sequence again repeating the reminder phrase. Having done a second round, we then again evaluate and if the disturbance still has not come down - which is rare, we do exactly the same again. If we are not getting results, then we will need to seek to understand why. The possible obstacles will be addressed later but generally they are: 1. A "type of psychological reversal" which requires the collarbone breathing technique. 2. Energy toxins, which are preventing the correction of the energy field. 3. We are tapping for the wrong issue. There is another core or parallel issue here which needs to be addressed in order for the disturbance to be removed. This work with aspects will be discussed further on. I will just give one example. I was working with one woman on her fear of death, which would not go below a SUD of 8. I then asked her, "is there something else which is bothering you?" She immediately answered, "I do not want to leave my young children alone if I die." So we tapped for this which was the real issue and it came down to zero and so did her fear of death. So it is important to recognize and tap on the deeper energy disturbances of the deeper issues. Another example is that anger is usually a product of fear, hurt or guilt. In such cases we might have to work on these before our anger will come down. The beautiful part of EFT is that when we work on something like anger, whatever is behind it will usually surface by itself when we tap on the issue. When the SUD Does Come Down When the SUD comes down even slightly we alter the process slightly. 1. In the setup while rubbing the sore spot or tapping the side of the hand, we now refer to the problem as "remaining _____." For example the phrase might be: "Even though I have this remaining fear of heights (spiders, snakes, darkness, elevators - whatever it might be), I deeply and profoundly love myself." or "Even though I have this remaining pain in my lower back, I deeply and profoundly love myself." The word "remaining" here is important because it allows our tapping to address the specific energy field, which is remaining. Also it psychologically reminds us that the discomfort is less and falling. 2. In the step 2 sequence, while tapping on the twelve points we refer to "remaining ______" Examples: Remaining fear of heights Remaining fear of elevators. Remaining anger Remaining lower back pain. 3. Step 3 - the gamut series is performed as usual without changes. 4. Step 4 - We do the sequence again tapping on the twelve points using again the reminder phrase "remaining ______." At this point we complete our round. We now check the SUD again. Whether it has gone down or not, we now continue with the setup and reminder phrases which refer to the "remaining _____." In this way most people will have become free from their specific problem in one to five rounds. If they do not, then we need to search for the possible complications mentioned above and which we will examine in detail later. They may have 1. A strong psychological reversal. 2. Energy toxins 3. Other aspects or core issues that need to be worked on before this problem can be solved. A Brief Reminder of the Process 1. Connect with your targeted emotion and stimulus for that. 2. Evaluate the degree of disturbance felt when you bring the stimulus to mind. 3. The Sore Spot - On your chest rub with affirmations. A. Even though I_________ I deeply and completely accept myself. (Psychological reversal) B. Then: I want to be free from this____________. 4. The Sequence - tapping each point 7 times repeating reminding words _____________. 5. Gamut Series - just behind and between the knuckles of your ring and little finger. a. Eyes closed. b. Eyes open. c. Eyes hard down right while holding the head steady. d. Eyes hard down left while holding the head steady. e. Roll eyes in a circle as though your nose was at the center of a clock and you were trying to see all the numbers in order. f. Same e only reverse the direction in which you roll your eyes. g. Hum 2 seconds of a song (suggest Happy Birthday). h. Count rapidly from 1 to 5. i. Hum 2 seconds of a song again. 6. Repeat the sequence - in same way. (If there is emotional disturbance - allow to be released) This is one round 7. Focus on the stimulus and evaluate the degree of disturbance. If not down to 0 or 1, then do again from 1 to 6 using the reminding phrase - now with word - remaining ___________. part 3. "Even tough I still have some ________________ I deeply and completely accept myself. Parts 4 the reminding words "remaining __________________________________" Parts 5. Gamut series and and 6. the reminding words "remaining ___________________" 8. Close with positive projection of self feeling, secure, worthy, peaceful & loving in that situation. Persistence What is extremely important here is persistence. Some problems will heal in a matter of minutes - it is not unusual. Other might take longer and require a number of sessions. The intensity or the duration of the problem is not the factor that delays the healing process. An intense phobia of fifty years can be collapsed in five minutes (as we saw with the case of Mary?s fear of water). What makes an issue more difficult is how many aspects, emotions and experiences are involved in its creation and how much resistance there is to letting it go. This will be dealt with. The Floor to Ceiling Eye Roll This is another of Dr. Callahan?s discoveries. With our head fixed straight ahead, we tap on the gamut point as our eyes start out looking hard down at the floor and then gradually come forward to focus in front of us as they slowly move up to the ceiling or sky. This should take at least 7 seconds. We use this to complete the process whenever we have finished with our rounds. We can also use it when we have arrived at a SUD of 2 or less, in which case, performing this procedure, usually brings it down to a zero. Energy Toxins Dr. Callahan also discovered in his research that there are certain substances which he calls "energy toxins" which may create a disturbance in the energy field and thus various negative emotions and physical problems. These are similar to allergic reactions but not the same. When a person has sensitivity to a certain substance, which is for him an energy toxin, TFT and EFT (and any other therapy that does not remove the toxin) may not work until this is removed from his or her environment or from the body itself. Some of the more common energy toxins are: nicotine, sugar, caffeine, perfumes, deodorants, some soaps and detergents, wheat and its products (perhaps with the exception of sprouted wheat), corn, milk and dairy products and aromatic herbs. Most people will have no problem with any of these and will easily get results employing EFT. Some, however, may not heal because these or other substances constitute for them energy toxins, which disrupt their energy field and do not allow the disturbances to be eliminated by the tapping. Even supposedly "good" food like potatoes, tomatoes, carrots, and beets could be an energy toxin for a specific person. If we are not getting results from EFT and have: v Worked with all the aspects which have come up in a particular issue and v Employed collarbone breathing for the stronger type of psychological reversal. Then we will likely need to examine the possibility of energy toxins. Some ways of dealing with energy toxins 1. Try doing EFT in different environments. Perhaps there is something in the environment we have been working in which is creating the problem. 2. Try employing EFT at different times of the day. It may have something to do with our various environments or what we are wearing and or eating at a time of the day. 3. Take a shower without soap or shampoo and do EFT naked. This will tell us if the toxin is in our soaps, shampoos or clothing. 4. If we still do not get satisfactory results, then we might want to do a three day fast of some type or at least go without: nicotine, sugar, caffeine, perfumes, deodorants, soaps and detergents, wheat and its products, corn, milk and dairy products and aromatic herbs. Then we are sure to have results unless we are tapping on the wrong issue entirely and some hidden core issue, which we are not tapping on, is creating the problem. When we do get our desired freedom from this issue, then we can gradually add foods one by one watching how our bodies and emotions react until we discover the culprit. One important key is that we usually have an addiction to substances that are energy toxins for us. So keep that in mind. Collarbone Breathing This is a process developed by Dr. Callahan for correcting deep-seated problems, which are similar to psychological reversal. According to Gary, this exists in only about 5 % of the population who seek help. When we have done more than five rounds without the SUD coming down, then we might want to consider employing this. We will, however, need to keep in mind that the problem might be other aspects, which we have not yet worked on or energy toxins. The procedure is the following: It actually does not matter which hand or on which side of the body we start. 1. Place the index and middle finger of the left hand into the collarbone point on the left side of the sternum. Fold the thumb and other fingers under so that they are not touching the body. Also allow both arms to be away from and not touching the body so that the only point of contact is that of the two fingers on the left collarbone point. Now as you tap with the index and middle finger of the right hand on the gamut point of the left hand (as if doing the gamut series) the fingers of which are on the left collar bone point do the following breathing procedure. a. Inhale fully. b. Exhale half of the air. c. Exhale the remaining air d. Inhale normally e. Exhale Note: Now all of the above holds for the rest of the tapping positions: * That the fingers and arms are placed so that the only point of contact is the finger on the collarbone point. * We do the same breathing process at all of the remaining seven positions which we will describe. * We tap vigorously but not so as to hurt ourselves in any way in each of the following configurations. So now we perform the above procedure in the following configurations: 2. With the knuckles of the index and middle fingers of the left hand in the left collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the left hand with the right index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. 3. With the fingertips of the index and middle fingers of the left hand in the right collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the left hand with the right index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. 4. With the knuckles of the index and middle fingers of the left hand in the right collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the left hand with the right index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. Now we switch hands and do exactly the same process with the fingers and knuckles of the right hand pressing in the collarbone points as we tap with the index and middle fingers of the left hand. 5. With the fingertips of the index and middle fingers of the right hand in the right collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the right hand with the left index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. 6. With the knuckles of the index and middle fingers of the right hand in the right collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the right hand with the left index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. 7. With the fingertips of the index and middle fingers of the right hand in the left collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the right hand with the left index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. 8. With the knuckles of the index and middle fingers of the right hand in the left collarbone point, we tap on the gamut point of the right hand with the left index and middle finger while performing the breathing procedure. Thus we have 5 acts of breathing in 8 positions for a total 40 acts of breathing while tapping on the gamut point in a way that this vibration is transferred to the collarbone point. This removes obstacles that have not been removed by the simpler methods of correcting for psychological reversal. Short cuts Gary?s 100% overhaul method includes all the steps that we will need in case there is actually a psychological reversal and also all the points we need to tap on in order to remove the energy disturbance. In reality, however, psychological reversal is actually present in only around 40% of the cases, except for specific groups such as victims of depression, illnesses of the immune system and other serious illnesses and persons seriously addicted to self-destructive substances. Actually, in most cases, the only points that need to be tapped on are the eyebrow, side of eye, under eye, under nose, chin, under arm and collarbone. In other words we do not always need to tap on the points on the hands. (Actually the index and middle finger points are being released anyway because we are tapping with them.) Dr. Callahan who is so deeply dedicated to relentlessly investigating more and more efficient ways of healing these "perturbations" or energy disruptions has found that in many cases of anxiety, phobias and addiction we need tap on only the under eye, under arm and collar bone points. These short cuts are best learned directly from Dr. Callahan or Gary Craig. My personal procedure is to do one round (with all four steps) with all the points to get the energy flowing through all the meridians and from there use the short cuts. If the SUD goes down, I continue with the short cuts, if not, I return to tapping all 12 points. I would suggest that for at least two or three months you learn to employ the whole procedure. Having mastered it, you may want to occasionally omit the correction for psychological reversal or some of the hand points or even the gamut series and see if you get results. If not, remember what you have omitted and include that in the next round. Actually the only reason to employ shortcuts is to gain time, but here we are talking about a therapy which heals in minutes or hours what usually takes years of weekly sessions or cannot be healed at all. So in reality the shortcuts have greater use for psychotherapists who need to economize time with clients or when performing in front of groups so that they do not get bored. To Index ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter Seven Case Histories and a Study in Aspects in EFT Part one EFT seminars and personal appointments in Cyprus and Lebanon I will be referring to some of my experiences from seminars and personal appointments in Lebanon and Cyprus. The names have been altered, except in cases where indicated. All of these people were freed from their specific problems at the time of the appointment. I have not been able to contact them for follow up. Clarifications Here I will be supplying you at times just with the first phrase (A), "Even though I have this ________, I deeply and profoundly love myself. or "Even though I have this ________, I accept and love myself as I am." In all of the cases mentioned, we worked on the other side of the body with the phrase (B), " I choose (want, deserve, allow, realize that it is in m benefit) to be free from this _______." That would complete the set up and then we would continue with the reminder phrase. In all of the cases people tapped for themselves at first so that they would learn and integrate the process. In some of the cases I then continued to tap for them for greater efficiency and economy of time, using at times Dr. Roger Callahan?s TFT algorithms. 1. Fear of an accelerating car, bus or plane: One interesting case was "Barno" who experienced intense fear every time he was in a car, bus, airplane or any vehicle someone else was operating. One major aspect was the vibration and sound of the vehicle accelerating. This prevented him from being able to get around by car, bus or plane. This fear would create a negative feeling in his genitals, which would then flow up into the abdomen and into the legs. This was the physical center of his fear experience. We started out with the phrase: a. "Even though I fear acceleration when others are driving..." This brought up the specific aspect of the sound and vibration, which is created. So we moved on to, b. "When I hear this sound and feel this vibration..." This brought up two memories simultaneously. c. One was an experience he had at the age of 13 when he experienced ejaculation while lying on his abdomen, without knowing exactly what was happening to him and experienced great fear, feeling that maybe he was ill. d. The second was at the same age running from his home to a bomb shelter while hearing the sounds of bombs whistling through the air. These happened at the same time in his life and it was after this, that he began to have this fear and reaction in his genitals. e. We worked separately on "Even though I feared when I ejaculated..." and then f. "Even thought I was afraid of the sound (vibration) of these bombs..." There seemed to have been an association made between the vibration of the accelerating vehicles, the bombs and his fear when he ejaculated (without understanding what was happening). Another common factor in these three seemingly independent stimuli is that in all of these cases, he was not in control. Outside forces seemed to be prevailing in: 1. The accelerating vehicle, driven by another. 2. The bombs falling. 3. The unexpected ejaculation. I do not know if our theory - with which he agreed - is true but he did go from a SUD of 10 to 0, while imagining himself in an accelerating vehicle driven by someone else, focusing especially on the sound. He was fine for the few remaining days I was there. I have had no communication with him after that. 2. Guilt, anger, pain, rejection and hate because of husband?s suicide. Efi and her husband were having communication problems. He was depressed, drinking heavily and not doing anything to heal or help himself. She left for a week. He committed suicide. You can imagine how many aspects were brought to the surface. We worked separately with each of her emotions as they came up, sometimes switching from one to the other so that we could bring down the previous one. In our first session she focused on the pain of his loss: a. We worked with the Pain of Loss. "Even though I feel this pain at his loss..." This brought up the b. Anger at him for committing suicide and punishing her in this way. "Even though I feel this anger at him for doing this to me ..." And then: c. Anger at his family members who were blaming her for his suicide. "Even though I feel this anger at his family for blaming me for his death ..." d. Then the pain of being rejected and treated badly by his family. "Even though I feel this intense pain because of being rejected and accused by his family in this way..." Until now she had been unable to recognize the obvious - her own feelings of guilt. I had asked her if she was feeling guilty but it was difficult for her to admit to herself. So, I let it be. Thus, we were not addressing the basic underlying emotion. Consequently we went from a beginning 10 on all the above to around 3. In our next session, a few days later, I asked her again about the guilt and now she was able to see her feelings of guilt for having left him before he committed suicide. So we worked on: e. Guilt for not having been with him and having had these conflicts with him. "Even though I feel this guilt for having left him before he committed suicide ..." This then caused her to understand that his family (and even her children at times) were simply reflecting back to her, her own feelings of guilt. After a few more rounds, when she was able to free herself from her own guilt, all the other feelings disappeared. She came down to a zero on all issues. She was at peace with herself and the others. I have found this to be very common. Often behind anger we find pain and guilt which obstruct our freedom from anger. Anger is a mechanism, which allows us to avoid feeling our pain, guilt and sometimes our fear. Thus when working with anger, hate or even pain of loss, I often look for fear or guilt as more core emotions. 3. Fear of Bankruptcy Alice was unable to free herself from her fear of impending bankruptcy. She had headaches and was obviously in continuous anxiety throughout the EFT seminar in Cyprus. After doing EFT with a large group, I asked for hands of those who had not come down below a SUD of 5. She raised her hand stating that she was still a 10. I asked her if she would like to come to the front of the room to work on this. She agreed but when I asked her to make the first set up statement, she suddenly had the need to vomit and I sent her with another woman to the toilets where she, in fact, vomited just at this thought of possibly having to succumb to bankruptcy. She had been unable to sleep for one week. At the end of the first day, I asked her if she would like to stay 20 minutes and work on this. She agreed. Her first feeling was that, "This is the end ? there is no life after bankruptcy." We worked on each of these in this series: a. There is no life after bankruptcy That brought up: b. I will be a failure if this happens which brought up c. I am weak and can do nothing. This then lead her to feel d. Anger and then revenge towards those who were pressuring here to pay (7,000 $) Then the feeling: e. They are using me and abusing me. Then, when we brought all of the above to 2 or less, I asked her to imagine giving the money, avoiding the bankruptcy and tell me what she felt. She answered, f. I feel that I am stupid a fool to pay this and that I will lose my self-worth if I pay them. We then worked with, "Even though I feel that I lose my self-worth if I pay them.." When that came down to zero, I then asked her how she felt and what she wanted to do. She answered, simply "The easiest thing to do is to pay them and relax." This is so indicative of EFT. She was sleepless, in agony and even vomited with the idea of working on it, and, she is now telling me, "the easiest thing to do is to pay what I owe" This option was there all the time!!! She had the money. It was no big deal. She simply didn?t want to be the fool and let them get what they wanted. When she overcame that, she was free. Although she had the money all the time, she was obstructed by her fear of losing her self-worth The next day she came in beaming and expressed her gratitude that she had become free from this emotional and physical ordeal. She had slept deeply and was beaming all day long. 4. Anger at brother in law Suzan?s husband had died four months earlier from cancer. She was very angry with his brother because he was behaving in a way which caused her and her husband and children to experience pain and injustice during and after her husband?s painful illness and death. We started with her a. Anger and then b. Hate This surprisingly became c. Jealousy because he and his wife were living a fine life and were accepted and respected by the community. This lead to the: d. Need to expose him to the community so that everyone could see "who he really was". This then lead us to the realization that: e. She needed his acceptance because without it f. She would have to work more to gain the acceptance of the community. She feared losing the village?s acceptance because of her negative relationship with him and his wife who used to a be very good friend of hers. After working on these, when I asked her about how she felt about forgiving them, the answer was. g. They will not forgive me. h. I feel like I will be losing my self-worth if I forgive them and they do not accept. We worked on these until she felt okay regardless of the community?s beliefs and her brother in law?s behavior. Suzan came down to a zero on all aspects of this issue. Comment: What comes up here is that we often find forgiveness difficult when we: a. Are afraid of that the other will not respond. b. Still need something from the other, which we fear we will not get. c. Believe that such forgiveness would make the other think that he or she is right and thus we are wrong. d. When we do not want to confront our feelings of fear. I received an email from Suzan about a month later with the following message. The brackets are mine for clarification. Dear Robert, I want you to know how grateful I am to you for teaching me a treasure (EFT) that has been doing miracles to me. It is such a quick and easy remedy, such an easy way of relieving oneself from any unwanted feeling. To be specific, on the day I saw you, and later in the evening, my elder daughter noticed a change in me. She noticed I was calmer than usual and more relaxed. The fear I had from meeting brother (in law) and his wife or popping into the village, has diminished. They were around on Saturday, but I was very relaxed and free from the very negative feelings I had before. Five days later, I knew that they were going to be at a certain party with me along with around 25 people from the same circle. The group is small, and this irritated me and made me a bit worried. So, I thought of the exercise and the tapping. I did that around four times moving from one feeling to the other, just the same way you did with me. I had such a nice evening, lots of self-confidence, and lots of thinking of you. Thank you. I do believe in your way (EFT). I believe it can change lives. It has started changing mine already. 5. Fear of riding in an elevator Alice was afraid of riding in elevators ever since her mother?s death when she was about 26 years old. She is now 40. She was also afraid of death. She chose to start with that, after a short discussion about which might be the core issue. The fear of the elevator was obviously included in the fear of death. a. We worked on the fear of death and got it down to 1. b. Then we worked on fear of riding in the elevator bringing the following aspects one by one down to 1 or 0. a. Riding in the elevator b. Being stopped in the elevator c. Not being able to breathe if it stops d. Darkness if it stops e. Not being to get out if it stops. Although, when she thought of each of these aspects she had no emotional charge anymore and she was quite calm, she was still not ready for a trial run in the elevator. (The elevators in Lebanon stop regularly due to electrical failures and we were on the seventh floor.) I believe there were still other aspects we had not found (some perhaps from before birth) or some type of energy toxins working. I had to leave the next day and was unable to pursue this matter. What is interesting here, however, are the various aspects of riding, stopping, breathing, darkness and not being able to get out, which came up as we worked on each previous aspects bringing the SUD down. 6. Anger at her girlfriend Ann was angry with her girlfriend for something she had done many years ago. She saw her girlfriend, "every night in her dreams" We worked on the anger (on the stage in the first day of the seminar) and got it down to 5. As it wasn?t moving down anymore, I asked if she felt any guilt concerning her girlfriend. She immediately answered yes (she had not treated her well when she was in need) and that the SUD for the guilt was a 5, just like the anger. We worked on the guilt and when it came down to zero so did the anger. She was freed from the problem and the pain, which it was creating for her. Again we see that guilt is the actual core emotion behind anger or pain. 7. Fear of touching his eyes. For the last 40 years Dimitri was unable to touch his eyes and would cringe and shiver whenever he ever saw his wife putting in her contact lenses. During the seminar his discomfort became even greater because of the need to make the eye movements in the gamut series. At the end of the first day, I asked them all to perform 5 rounds at home before returning the next day. That night he got even worse and didn?t want to get up in the morning and had an aversion to coming to the next day of the seminar. He came and while we were doing a tapping exercise for addictions, he remembered an experience from his childhood where he was very disappointed by his parent?s indifference towards something that was important to him. He then harmed his eyes and made them red and puffy so as to get their attention. He tapped for this disappointment and rejection which he had felt during those years. After one round, he was released from that. He later informed us of what had happened explaining how simple it now seemed to him. He now perceived that what he did then was important for him and it did not matter whether or not it was important to his parents. This type of cognitive change is so indicative of EFT transformations when the energy field is put in order and the emotional static is removed. He showed us all how easy it was to touch his eyes now. And even asked his wife to take out and replace her contacts so he could check out his reaction. He was totally fine. If he had not kept it up, he would not have been healed. This verifies for me the importance of persistence on these issues. Some of us have this ability to continue even when not getting immediate results or even when getting worse. Many, however, do not. In such cases, they require a seminar or an experienced practitioner to pressure them. If he had not come to the seminar that day (because his wife was coming), he might not have realized and worked on this. . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter Eight Case Histories and a Study in Aspects in EFT Part two EFT seminars and personal appointments in Greece The names of course have been altered, except in cases were we indicate that this is the real name. Some, but not all, of these people are also involved in our self-knowledge seminars and psychology discussion groups. Many of their problems had been solved through those seminars and we are now working on what has remained. I will not mention the complete set up phrases, but only the subject of each round. In all of the cases people tapped for themselves at first so that they would learn and integrate the process. In some of the cases I then continued to tap for them for greater efficiency and economy of time, using at times the short cuts (or algorithms as he calls them) discovered by Dr. Callahan. 8. Inability to eat Beth was unable to eat. As we worked on this problem with, "Even though I fear eating, I deeply and profoundly love myself", the following aspects came to the surface: a. Fear of mother?s anger and suppression (she would force her to eat and drink milk). b. Pain of seeing her mother hit her sister on the head with shoe and blood squirting out of her sister?s head. c. Pain because her father told her that she was not their child, but was left by the gypsies. d. Anger at her mother for what she had done During that first session we worked with all of these, bringing them all down to a SUD of three. I asked her to keep a diary of her feelings and write down any childhood memories, which came to the surface. A week later she was much improved and we made some tests on the previous aspects. The following new aspects came up: e. Fear when hearing her mother shrieking when she (the mother) was hitting her sister on the head. f. Fear of not being able to handle, manage or cope with life. g. Inability (fear) to express herself. We worked on these bringing them all down to 0 or 1. Then I asked her to express herself to her mother in a form of psychodrama, telling her what she felt and what she needed as a child. We worked with whatever came up during the psychodrama. She is now much better and eating normally. She still has many other issues to work with, but has temporarily moved to another location. I received a telephone message on my answering machine after a month, in which she informed me that she had to leave, but that her eating was much better. 9. Fear of Cancer Jane had a fear of cancer: a. As we worked on "Even though I fear dying of cancer, I deeply and profoundly love myself," she came up with the following realization. As her SUD came down, she realized that her father had not allowed her to see her aunt when her aunt was dying of cancer. b. When we worked on her feeling of rejection at being prohibited from seeing her ill aunt when she was a child, her fear of cancer disappeared. I am not sure if I really understood this connection, but it worked. (Perhaps she felt some guilt about not being able to see her aunt?) We never investigated this further. 10. Back pain, insomnia, depression, guilt, anger and panic attacks. Anna experienced excruciating back pain and was able to sleep only 1.5 hours a night. She was also very angry with her first husband for cheating on her, and was now unable to be sexually open to her second husband. She felt depressed and tried to commit suicide after about 5 years of her first marriage. She also had frequent panic attacks especially when going to sleep at night. For our first session we started with her lower back (she had a cyst in a slipped disc) and leg pain. This brought up a. Anger at being betrayed by her previous husband. b. Pain because of his betrayal. c. Resistance towards being approached sexually by her present husband. All were brought down to 0 or 1. That night she slept for about 12 hours and felt no depression the next day. She was also able to accept her present husband more lovingly. She had a clearer mind and did not need to take her sleeping pill to sleep as she usually did. In our next session she learned how to bring the physical pain in her lower back down to zero by herself. When she did this it would disappear for about 20 minutes and then come back. (She has an actual problem there.) Even though she got relief from the EFT, she did it only a few times a week, which caused us to believe that there must be some type of reversal which is preventing her from employing EFT to her own benefit. I asked her to imagine herself doing EFT 10 times a day for the physical pain and 3 times a day for various past traumas, which were coming up in the discussion. d. When she rubbed the sore spot and repeated "even though I feel resistance to employing this technique regularly for my own benefit," she stopped and started crying and then shared with me that when she divorced her ex-husband, she was unable to take custody of their son. She then described her son?s present problems which, were really worrying her. It became obvious that part of the resistance had to do with guilt about not being able to care for her son then and also for trying to commit suicide in front of him. (She had this image of him as a small child watching her as she tried to commit suicide.) She shared these events with me for about ten minutes (without any tapping) and then I asked her how her lower back was. It had descended from a 10 to a 2 just by airing these feelings. She then understood the role of her thoughts and feelings in increasing this pain. But the fact was, however, that she did have a serious physical problem in her lower back. e. We went on to tap for the guilt about leaving her child with his father and brought it from a 5 to 0. f. Then we went on to work on the guilt for attempting suicide, which also moved from 8 to 1. g. Then we tapped for the back pain, which was almost gone and brought it down to 0. I asked her to employ EFT 5 to 10 times a day for her lower back and work on each specific childhood experience separately so as to remove their emotional charge. Some of the experiences were: Ø Her father was very violent, beating her brother and their farm animals and also killing cats, kittens and mice. Ø He rejected her constantly. Ø When her mother found out that she had a relationship at the age of 16, she told her that it would be better if she (Anna) died so that her mother could have peace. She now needed to work on each of these traumas and thus remove the general tension in the subconscious and energy field, nervous system and muscles, which were adding to the back pain problem. About a month later we worked again on her feelings of: 1. Guilt for having tried to commit suicide in front of her child. 2. The symptoms, which she felt when she was committing suicide, such as coldness in the limbs, dizziness, weakness and fear of death. 3. The panic attacks which were much less but still occasionally there. As we were working on these three issues, which seemed all related to that one suicide attempt experience, her symptoms of coldness and weakness appeared in her body. We worked directly on these symptoms until her feelings about them dropped to zero and then the symptoms disappeared. This is very common. We actually feed our symptoms when we fear and do not accept them. When we accept them, they recede. We worked a little more bringing all the aspects down to zero as she focused her son in front of her as she made the suicide attempt and the physical symptoms, which she had then. She left ten emotional pounds lighter, but still had issues to work with. 11. Guilt about son?s cancer Gina, a pediatrician, felt guilt about her son?s serious skin cancer because she felt that, as a doctor, she should have seen it coming and taken corrective actions much earlier. a. When we started her guilt was 10. b. She also felt sorrow for her son. We tapped for the guilt and when it came down to about a 5 and then I asked if there was any other feeling. She answered, pain and sorrow for her son. We worked on this, which then brought up: c. Pain and abandonment from God for not helping her to discover this earlier. She then had a memory, which she believes is from a past life in which she threw a child into a river causing its death. And now she believes she deserves what is happening for this reason. d. We worked on the guilt of "having thrown a child in the river" (So now we have EFT for past life emotions. Even if it is not true, it exists in her mind and needs to be dealt with) e. When this also came down, I asked her what she was feeling and she answered, "I feel like I am trying to get into a circle but cannot." I intuitively asked her, "Do you miss feeling guilty?" She answered, "Yes" This guilt had been a part of her life and now she was looking for it. f. So we tapped for the "need to feel guilty." Comment: This is an important form of resistance towards freeing ourselves from emotions and it needs to be addressed. We become addicted to emotions such as fear, guilt, anger, injustice and pain. I actually hypothesize that each of these emotions creates a specific hormonal ? chemical - energy state, which becomes a habit or addiction and when we do not get our dose, we seek to create the circumstances to feel that familiar feeling. We all know people who seem to looking to be rejected or hurt and will find any reason to be so. Others may need their weekly, weekend or monthly "dose" of conflict, anger or suffering. We describe how to work with these forms of resistance in other chapters. The next time I saw Gina, although she was still sad about her son, she was free from the guilt. I usually ask people to support their new state by asking, "why do you not feeling guilty", just to check to see if an insight or realization has been made. Her answer was, "This was my state of evolution. It was all that I could do." She had realized and accepted this simple truth which we all logically know, but cannot experience because of our disturbed energy fields. 11. Fear of public speaking Lena had an intense fear of public speaking. We began to work on this "even though I fear speaking in front of othersÉ" She was immediately transported back to an event in her childhood where she about 8 years old in front of her class, and her mother (who was present) asked that she recite a poem in front of the class. Her mother was very proud of her daughter and of course herself for having such a special daughter. She would repeatedly say to Lena, you are special, you are not like the others, creating in her great pressure to be special, better and consequently separate from the others. This caused Lena to feel quite lonely. She could not be just "one of the group". The result in that childhood experience was that she actually refused to speak in front of the class and disappointed her mother. These experiences create pressure on her today to be perfect, particularly when she is speaking in front of others. She is a lawyer. We worked on the following aspects, which came up one by one: a. Fear of speaking in front of others. b. Shame for not satisfying them (especially her mother). c. Anger with her mother. d. Anger with herself. e. Feeling others as antagonistic when she is speaking in front of them. f. The need to please them and fear of not being able to do so. g. Guilt because of disappointing them. h. Suppression because of feeling that she has to satisfy them. We can see here how a supposedly positive affirmation can create serious problems, when it is interpreted to mean that the child will be worthy of acceptance and love only if he or she always fulfills these prerequisites. Some examples might be: a. Message: You are special - different - better. Resulting belief: I must always be special, different and better in order to be worthy of love and acceptance. b. Message: You are the prettiest. Resulting belief: I must be prettier than the others in order to be worthy of love and acceptance. c. Message: You are the smartest. Resulting belief: I must know more than the others in order to be loved and accepted. The problem with such messages is that they create the idea that we are loved under certain conditions and also that we must compete with others for those conditions. At our second meeting, we continued with the public speaking problem, which seemed to still be there, addressing the following aspects. a. Fear of leading people to wrong conclusions with what I tell them. b. Fear of their opinion of me as I speak. c. Fear that they will not understand what I have to say. d. Feelings of separateness - loneliness. After one month we spoken about this last feeling of separateness from others, which she explained was about 3 or 4. This was not something negative, but something which allowed her to find her center more easily and spend her time more creatively. She had no negative feelings about feeling different and separate. 12. Guilt, pain and rejection towards homosexual and drug-using son. Martha?s son is involved with drugs and his sexual preference is homosexuality. He ended up in jail for about six months. We worked on the following feelings concerning this issue: a. Guilt that she was in some way responsible for his reality. This went from 10 to 5 and then to a zero. b. Injustice that this should happen to her. This started at 10 and came to zero. c. Pain in her chest in the area of the heart. This started at 9 and fell to zero. d. Rejection towards him and his lifestyle choices. This started at 10 and fell after a number of rounds to zero. e. I then asked her to check the guilt again and it had gone up to 3 so we tapped again for that and it came again to zero. In the end I asked her, why she accepts him now when ten minutes earlier had rejected him with a SUD of 10. She answered simply, "because I love him." This is so common with EFT. Our emotional disturbances are covering our deeper wisdom and love. When they are removed, we experience our true selves. Comment: Why would the guilt come up again? My theory is that we have a basic belief that "someone must be to blame". Thus as long as she was rejecting him, she was hiding some portion of her own feelings of responsibility. When her rejection towards him was removed, the remaining guilt, which was hidden behind her rejecting him, came to the surface, but was easily removed. This is an interesting phenomenon. We seem to solve problems by blaming or rejecting others. Having done so, we can "relax". I once experienced this very clearly. Some students who left our center began to spread the most horrible and obscene lies about me. This hurt me, as I loved them and they were still in my heart. After a few months of this ordeal, a friend of mine said to me, "You are in pain, because you do not believe in evil. These people are evil." In my next meditation, I allowed myself to try out the thought, "They are evil". I felt an immediate relaxation and realized how most of us solve our problems. We no longer feel hurt; we have nothing to examine in our lives, nothing to change. Very convenient. No evolution is necessary on our part, because all the blame is on the others. I immediately realized that this is not the way I wanted to deal with this and found peace in my faith, that I am the sole creator of my reality and that all others are simply giving me the lessons I need in order to grow spiritually. In this case I needed to learn: * Not to care what others think of me. * To forgive and love those who were spreading these lies. Comment: Another belief, which causes us to reject others, is, "there must be only one right way and all other perceptions are wrong." If the other is right, then I am must be wrong. Thus, I have the need to believe that the other wrong, so I can be right. We have difficulty realizing that we are all in an evolutionary process and each person is growing through his specific experiences and experiments with life. This is also true of our belief that someone has to be to blame for something that has gone wrong. Another perception would be that what is happening is exactly what we need for our evolutionary process. In Martha?s case, she needed to free herself from the belief that she is guilty and also that her son is wrong. 13. Pain for son in jail and sister?s rejection and greed Louise?s son has been in jail for the last eight years on drug charges. He broke out once and was caught and his sentence was increased. She had suffered much all these years. She was still suffering when she came to the appointment. She had overcome her feelings of guilt and responsibility, but not the pain of seeing her son in prison. a. We worked on the pain she felt for her son in prison. It came down slowly 10 to 9 to 8 to 6 to 3 to zero. I asked her why she did not feel any more pain. She answered, "It seems that as a soul, he has chosen to have these experiences." Louise had another problem. Her sister refused to share their family inheritance. In order to avoid fighting, Lousy gave in and gave it all to her. b. We worked with her pain. This also moved slowly from 10 to 8 to 6to 3 to zero. c. Then we worked on her feeling rejected by her sister. This went from 10 to 2 to zero. She was glowing when she left. Two great burdens had been lifted. Thank God for EFT. We spoke four weeks later and she was still very well on both issues, even though she had contact with both her son and her sister. She no longer had any of those emotions we worked on. She mentioned to me that she really could not understand how easy it was to free herself from those feelings. 14. Fear of driving, anger and guilt Amalia was afraid to drive a car. She had obtained a license, but had not ever had the courage to actually drive. We worked on the following aspects: a. Shame that she cannot drive. b. Fear that she does not know how to drive. c. Fear of doing damage to others with the car d. Fear of hitting someone with the car. At this point she remembered that her brother had been killed in a car crash. Her feelings changed, and we worked on: e. The pain of losing of her brother. f. Anger at her brother, because of the way he treated her. g. Anger with her father, because he never protected her from her brother. h. Guilt because she felt released by her brother?s death. All of the above were brought down to one. There seemed to be some remaining aspect, which needed to be dealt with. A week later, she drove the family car. There may be more work to do, but she drove for the first time in fifteen years. Comment: I believe that Amalia?s fear of doing damage to others is in someway related to her guilt for feeling relieved with her brother?s death. She had wished him to die when he was torturing her. Ordinarily we would suppose that she would fear that she would have to die in the same way of she was feeling guilt. But she says her fear is of doing damage to others, not herself. I am not sure of how she has made this connection, but this is what has come forth 15. Fear of losing a child by death. All of her life, Marina feared losing a child, and specifically her youngest of two boys. She had lost her father and brother when they were executed in their village, by the Germans during their occupation of Greece in the Second World War. We worked on the following aspects as they appeared: a. Fear of death of her youngest child. (We decided to make it as specific as possible) b. Pain of the loss of her father who was killed. c. Pain of loss of her brother who was killed. d. Fear of danger as a child without her father?s protection. e. Rejection from society because she did not have a father. f. Sadness because of all that she has lost in life because of this. After working on bringing all these aspects down, we returned to the original issue of the fear of the death of either of her children and it had become zero. I spoke with her two months later. She said there might be a 10% remaining problem but that she is 90% better with this one session. 16. Fear of death Miriam?s fear of death frequently bothered her. In a seminar with 30 participants she was one of two who, after tapping with the group, was unable to come down satisfactorily. She still had a fear of death with a SUD of 8. a. She came up to the front of the room and we did two rounds. It came down only to 6. Intuitively suspecting some other issue was involved, I asked her, "are you having any other feelings or thoughts at this time." She immediately responded, "Actually I am more afraid of leaving my two little children alone here if I die." b. We then worked on her fear of leaving her children if she left her body. This came down to a zero in two rounds. We then returned to the fear of death and she could not find it. This is very common. We need to be intuitively aware of other issues when the SUD is not coming down. 17. "Black barrier" in chest which prevents joy Susan had a "black barrier in her chest" which did not allow her to feel joy. We did one round for this "black barrier in my chest." She then cried for about 5 minutes for the loss of her mother, when she was seven years old. Until that time, she had never cried about this loss. She walked away without the "black barrier". 18. Fear of wife?s anger and results on the family John feared his wife?s angry outbursts. He had cheated on her a few years ago, and she has not yet overcome her pain and anger and she frequently explode in anger. They have one adolescent boy. We worked on the following aspects: a. Fear for what will happen to the family if this continues. b. Feeling rejected by his wife. c. Doubt about himself as a person. d. Fear and uncertainty about the future, if his wife doesn?t overcome her anger. All of these came to zero. He walked away without these feelings, but not seeming to realize what had happened. (There was no time to explain to him what we were doing.) 19. Knot in throat, anger, guilt and pain. Donna had an annoying blockage in her throat. She was unsure about remaining with her husband who had left her and now wanted to return. She was also angry with herself, because she had made a decision to leave him, but did not. a. We tapped first for her anger at her husband. This brought up other issues, which we then worked on. b. Anger with her husband who because of his ramblings had brought into their bed an aphrodisiacal illnesses, which their two year old daughter, who sometimes slept with them, contracted. c. Anger at her husband because he wasn?t working and bringing any money into the home. This brought up: d. Guilt |