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Dear Friend,
May this find you well and happy.
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This is Part 10 of your 19 segment weekly email course which you requested on
"Being Ready for Our Own Deaparture from Our Physical Body".
For much more on this subject we suggest the books "The Psychology of Happiness"
and "Relationships of Conscious Love" by Robert Elias Najemy which can
be found as pdf ebooks at http://HolisticHarmony.com/ebooks/index.asp
and also in your booksores, at Amazon.com or for 40% discount at
http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/psychofhappiness.htmlMay you enjoy it and benefit
from it.
**********************************C) HARMONIZING OUR RELATIONSHIPS
Our degree of spiritual evolution can be measured in terms of our ability to love.
The degree of harmony in our interpersonal relationships is also a function of
our ability to love unconditionally. Thus we can understand much about our strengths
and weaknesses along the spiritual path by observing the degree of harmony or
conflict we experience in our relationships with others.
We will attract to ourselves exactly the individuals and characters that have
something to teach us. Our close family members and friends are chosen before
we are born because we have much to teach and learn from each other. The relationship
is destined in order to teach and learn from each other. The relationship is destined
from before birth; but our reactions are our own free will.
For example, it may be fate that we will have to receive rejection from our close
relatives. But how we will react to that rejection is up to our own free will.
We can become hurt, angry and bitter; or we can avoid all contact with them and
suppress our feelings; or we can continue to love them unconditionally, realizing
that the problem is theirs and not ours.
Thus the realm of personal relationships is a major field of learning here on
the earth, especially for the emotionally oriented individual. When a relationship
is not going well, we will do well to examine ourselves for selfishness, immaturity,
pride, lack of self-confidence, and, most important of all, lack of love. The
disharmonies in our relationships will show us our weaknesses and where we have
to develop more.
We decide, even before we come to this earth, to play these various roles with
those around us, so that we may all continue with our spiritual evolution. We
may come over and over with the same spirits until we work things out with them.
There are three main attractive forces between people, LOVE, HATE and FEAR. These
three emotions will attract the object of these emotions into our lives. It is
better to attract what we love rather than what we fear or hate. So let us work
on developing more love and transcending (not suppressing) hate and fear. And,
even if we do attract what we fear or hate, we can eventually overcome the problem
by learning to love what previously repelled us.
Psychiatrist Wambach’s subjects verified that they incarnated over and over
with the same spirits playing different roles. Consider some of these answers:
«My mother was my sister in a past life and my father was a lover. My first
son had been a grandfather in one lifetime of mine, my second son had been a father,
and my first daughter a friend. My second daughter I saw clearly as a mother of
mine in a past life». (Case A-225).
«My mother was a close male friend from a past life. My father was my wife
whom I used to treat cruelly in a past life». (Case A-460).
«I became aware that in one of my previous lives my mother killed both my
father and myself. Neither she nor my father remember, I became aware, but somehow
I always dreamed about this experience. Only now, as I see the relationships here
in the hypnosis, I have freed myself». (Case A-589).
«My mother was a mother of mine in a past life and also a child of mine
in a past life. My children told me they wanted to be my children before I was
born, and I knew them not only from past lives, but from the between-life period».
(Case A -381).
«I knew my mother had been my mother previously. I had been twins with my
father, so we were very close, I was aware of numerous other family relationships
that stem from past lives. I was glad to be a sister rather than a wife to my
brother». (Case A-513).
«My mother was a sister or close relation in a past life. My father was
a captain of a ship I was a sailor in. I got the impression that many other people
who were in this life were in a particular lifetime of mine in the 1600 ’s».
(Case A-558).
«I realize now that part of my purpose this time is to be aware of my mother’s
feelings toward me and learn to love her anyway. Oh boy, is that a toughie!»
(Case A-242).
«I came in this time period to correct past errors and to work out my guilt
about certain relationships». (Case A-57).
«I came in this time period because certain other people I needed to work
out relationships with, would also be alive at this time». (Case B-70)
«I came this time to get to know my mother better who was my best friend
in a previous life and she was alive in this time period». (Case B-55).
Psychiatrist Wambach’s comments on these results are of interest to us.
«Among the 87 percent responding «Yes» to the question about
knowing parents in past lives, there was an astonishing variety in the relationships
reported. Fathers in this lifetime had been lovers in the past, mothers in the
past, brothers, sisters, friends and children. Mothers in the current lifetime
were seen as friends, fathers, brothers, sisters, children. There was no consistency
at all in the way in which people in this life were related in past lives. The
Freudian hypothesis of daughters wishing that fathers were lovers was not evident
in the data, nor did sons see their mothers as wives in past lives more frequently
than seeing them in other relationships. Often parents in this life were friends
or distant relatives in past lives.
«Mates and lovers were perceived as friends, close relations, parents from
past lives as well as lovers. Some subjects did report that husbands or wives
in this lifetime had been in a sexual relationship with them in past lives as
well, so there appeared to be a trend for people to work out sexual relationships
by assuming the same sex roles in several lifetimes. But again, this was well
under one third of the reports of relationships in past lives to husbands or lovers
now».
This data along with other available information generates some of the following
thoughts.
1) We tend to incarnate over and over with some of the same spirits.
2) We incarnate with the spirits who have lessons to teach us or lessons to learn
from us.
3) If we are unable to harmonize the relationship in one life, we will have to
attract the same spirit or the same type of personality in a future life and eventually
learn the lesson.
4) It seems therefore logical and useful to try to harmonize our relationships
now, so that we may enjoy lives of greater love and harmony and, simultaneously,
have a free conscience at the moment of death.
In counseling people who are about to die, I have noticed that death is much more
disturbing to them when they have failed to harmonize their relationships with
those around them. Also those who remain, often feel guilt, that a mother, father
or sibling has passed on before they were about to «work things out with
them», and now it is too late.
Isn’t it better then to begin to take a look at our relationships today
and discover where we are harboring anger, resentment, bitterness, jealousy, hate,
fear or other separating emotions towards those around us. If these people are
available and open to communication, then we can begin to discuss our relationships
with them, with the hope of settling our differences, forgiving each other and
starting a new relationship based on love and communication.
There also may be positive emotions of love, affection, respect, gratitude or
admiration which we feel but have never expressed to these persons. It would be
shame for one of us to leave before these positive emotions are expressed.
This is one of the basic steps which we must take if we are to be ready for death
at any moment; whether it be our own or the other’s death. If the other
is not available, or not ready, to listen or communicate, then we can at least
transform our own feelings. We can let go all of our bitterness and other negative
feelings, and imagine the other surrounded by light and love and wish him well.
We can forgive him for everything and at least clear up any negativity from our
side. Then we will be able to leave our physical body much more peacefully, with
less karma to drag us back down into the same unpleasant type of human interaction.
LOVE and FORGIVENESS are our basic tools here.
One simple exercise is to imagine that you are about to die in a few minutes and
bring the various important people in your life to mind and think what you would
like to express to them before you leave. Write down your thoughts to these persons,
as you imagine that you will not see them again.
Then you might want to give this letter or express these feelings to them personally.
If we owe anything to anyone, it is best to repay it and not leave debts standing.
These debts will be like connecting chains, which will bind us again to the same
situation. If we have harmed someone, it is best to develop humility and ask for
forgiveness. If they don’t want to communicate about it, we can relax our
body and mind and imagine the scene in our minds and ask them for forgiveness
in our imagination. We can also write a letter asking for forgiveness. This will
clear us from the picture.
We may also ask God’s forgiveness. God is always ready to forgive the sincere
heart. And, lastly we must also forgive ourselves and not hold on to old guilt
which makes us feel separate from God and others.
If we have difficulty thinking of someone in a good light, we can relax the body
and mind and then imagine 5 positive qualities that this person has. In this way
we can change the image we have for this person. This will help to open our hearts
and our feelings; and the relationship with this person will certainly change.
The more we examine how we can prepare for a peaceful death, the more we realize
that preparation for death is in reality preparation for life. It is like the
relationship between sleeping and waking. If we have not lived our day in such
a way so as to feel peaceful and satisfied at the moment of falling asleep, we
will not be able to let go, and will feel restless. Thus the next day will be
even more unpleasant.
In the same way if we do not live our lives in harmony with our inner beliefs,
we will feel panic and remorse at the moment of death. Consequently, the next
life will start out with those unpleasant vibrations. We start out where we have
left off.
Dr. Moody’s subjects, who have died and come back to life, verify that they
were suddenly inspired to live much less selfishly.
1) «I didn’t tell anybody about my experience, but when I got back,
I had this overwhelming, burning, consuming desire to do something for other people…
I was so ashamed of all the things that I had done, or hadn’t done, in my
life. I felt like I had to do it, that it couldn’t wait».
2) «When I got back from this, I had decided I ’d better change. I
was very repentant. I hadn’t been satisfied with the life I had led up to
then, so I wanted to start doing better.
Another subject saw one spirit trying to communicate to those whom it had left
behind to change their ways before it was too late.
Dr. Moody: «Was there any particular thing she was trying to tell them?»
Subject: «Well, it seems more or less that she was trying to get through
to them, trying to tell them, seemingly, to do things differently from what they
were doing now, to change, to make a change in their life style. Now, this sounds
kind of put on, but she was trying to get them to do the right things, to change
so as not to be left like she was. «Don’t do as I did, so this won't
happen to you. Do things for others so that you won’t be left like this».
I ’m not trying to moralize or make a sermon, but this seemed to be the
message that she was trying to get across… It seemed that in this house
there was no love, if you want to put it that way… It seemed that she was
trying to atone for something she had done… It’s an experience I’ll
never forget».
Theologian Meletis, firmly believes that Spirits do continue their relationship
with the incarnated Spirits whom they have recently left.
«Does the departed Spirit have the power of communicating with its family,
acquaintances and friends? Or does it cease to be interested and think about the
people on the earth? There is no doubt whatsoever that there is intimate communication.
The relationship is not severed by death. It simply changes. The bounds and mutual
helping of one another between the living and the dead continue to survive. We
are one spiritual body with Christ as our head. Our spiritual bounds are not broken,
not even by death. The spirits of our loved ones are observing us, are interested
in us and struggle along with us in our pleasant and difficult tasks».
Perhaps the greatest obstacle toward our being able to transcend our emotional
weaknesses and negative reactions towards others is the fact that we are so controlled
by our attachments, aversions, fear, social programming and habit patterns. Self-examination
is one way in which we can observe and transcend some of these obstacles.
********************************
Go to http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/courses/index.asp for a list of other email
courses you can order - most are for free.
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ebooks available by Robert Elias Najemy
at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/ebooks/index.asp
1. Universal Philosophy
2. The Art of Meditation
3. Contemporary Parables
4. The Mystical Circle of Life
5. Relationships of Conscious Love
6. The Miracles of Love and Wisdom
7. Total Emotional Freedom – EFT and Self -knowledge
8. Saram – The Adventures of a Soul and Insight into the Male Psyche
And available also at bookstores near you and also on our site
9. The Psychology of Happiness
http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/psychofhappiness.html
****************************************
Robert Elias Najemy is the author of over 600 articles, 400 lecture cassettes
on Human Harmony and 20 books, which have sold over 100,000 copies.
He is the Founder and director of the Center for Harmonious Living in Greece with
3700 members.
His book The Psychology of Happiness is available at http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0971011605/holisticharmo-20
and http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/psychofhappiness.html.
You can download FREE articles and e-books from http://www.HolisticHarmony.com
where you can also receive guidance on life issues.
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