I. IN THE PAST

A. When did you feel guilt, shame or self rejection as a child?

1. When they shouted at you or beat you?
2. When you did not do what they asked you to do?
3. When you made mistakes?
4. When you hurt someone?
5. For sexual feelings or acts?
6. For the others’ problems?
7. For negative feelings which you had?
8. For desires which you had?
9. For the others’ illnesses?
10. For the others’ unhappiness?
11. When you did not do well in school?
12. When you were criticized or blamed?
13. When you felt fear?
14. When you told lies or stole?
15. When they declared you were a sinner or that you were no good?
16. When they talked to you about God and the devil?
17. When you did something forbidden? What? _____
18. When you came into contact with the opposite sex?
19. When they told you in some way that you were a bad child?
20. When others were not happy?
21. When others were not pleased with you?
22. When you were not as good at something as others were?
23. When others did not pay attention to you?
24. When you did not speak out about something that was important to you?
25. When you didn’t help someone when you could have?
26. When you did not succeed at something?
27. When others were disappointed in you?
28. When your siblings had problems?
29. When others around you were done injustice?
30. When they used you or took advantage of you?
31. When you did not receive the attention, affection and love you needed?
32. When they compared you with others?
33. Your parents, or other members of your family, did not behave properly?
34. When you were blamed for something?
35. When you did not get good grades at school?
36. When you were not able to be like someone else?
37. When you were not able to live up to others’ expectations?
Other______________________________
Removing the Obstacles to Self-esteem
Having determined our impediments towards feeling self-esteem in certain situations, we can then chose the first obstacle we want to work with. Best to work with the one, which is most intense and bothersome.
It is very likely that this work will bring us in touch with childhood traumas or experiences which have programmed us in this way and which will need to be transformed in our minds.
Having chosen the first obstacle we want to work with we can move on towards removing it.
A. Analyzing what we believe which causes us to lose our self-esteem and transform that belief.
B. Discovering our childhood experiences, which have conditioned us to feel that way and transform our childhood interpretation of those experiences. (For this we might find professional help through regressions, rebirthing, EMDR, TFT and EFT.)
C. We can use positive affirmations, which will allow us to accept and love ourselves as we are at this stage of our evolutionary process.
D. We can keep a high level of energy by eating healthily, exercising and / or dancing regularly, as well as by regular breathing exercises.
E. A realization of our inherent spiritual nature can help us accept ourselves as we are at this stage of our evolutionary process.
F. Just as we accept some others with their weakness, we need to understand and accept ourselves in the same way
G. We can correct the disturbed energy field, which is creating these feelings. This is possible through new methods of "Energy Psychology" based on Dr. Callahan’s Thought Field Therapy. (A simplified version can be found at http://www.emofree.com) (Once you learn how to perform the technique you can learn to employ it towards various goals at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/eft/index.asp

To be continued ...
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Robert Elias Najemy is the author of over 600 articles, 400 lecture cassettes on Human Harmony and 20 books, which have sold over 100,000 copies.
He is the Founder and director of the Center for Harmonious Living in Greece with 3700 members.
His book The Psychology of Happiness is available at http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0971011605/holisticharmo-20 and http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/psychofhappiness.html.
You can download FREE articles and e-books from http://www.HolisticHarmony.com where you can also receive guidance on life issues.
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