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Dear Friend,
May this find you well and happy. ********************************* This is Part 9 of your 12 segment weekly email course which you requested on "Dealing with the Departure of Loved Ones ". These segments are from the book ""Mystical Circle of Life"" which has an abundance of useful information on death and dying and which we suggest you order as an ebook (pdf file) at http:HolisticHarmony.com/ebooks/index.asp. This information is also explained in the book "The Psychology of Happiness" which can be found in your booksores at Amazon.com or for 40% discount at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/psychofhappiness.html May you enjoy it and benefit from it. ********************************** NEGATIVE THOUGHT FORMS ABOUT THE DEATH OF A LOVED ONE These emotions are the result of various beliefs, programmings or thought forms which have been programmed into our conscious and subconscious minds. As long as the beliefs are there, the emotions will come forth. The beliefs are like the fire and the emotions are the smoke. Let us look at some of these beliefs which generate these emotions within us. 1. I cannot live without him (her). 2. I am not secure without him (her). 3. No one else but he or she can give me joy or security. 4. My life has no meaning without him (her). 5. I want to die also, I want to be with him/ her. We have been programmed that we must have specific persons close to us who will make us feel secure, happy, worthy etc. We give these persons the «keys» to our happiness. Very likely there was a time in our lives when we didn't even know them, when we were not with them. Now we cannot imagine that we can be happy without them. But the truth is that we can. So many billions of people who have lived on the earth and lost their loved ones have proven this. Each has thought these thoughts, but each has moved on to live a normal life when these feelings naturally subsided and the need to continue pushed up and over these fears. We will eventually move on, just as all those before us have. Every one of us will lose every one we know, either through our death or that of those we know. Each and every one of us will die within the next 70 to 90 years (in order to take into consideration the small children that we know). We will lose all. All will lose us. This is the nature of the physical universe. 6. Death is a bad, painful experience. Wrong! All who have died momentarily and returned report that leaving our of the body is a wonderful and very enjoyable experience. Very few wanted to return to the body. We who remain continue to suffer and learn lessons. They are on «vacation» from the school of evolution. 7. I don¹t have the right to be happy since my loved one has died. 8. I will betray my loved one if I become happy. 9. I will betray my loved one if I love someone else as much as I loved him (her). 10. I will betray my loved one if I find a different purpose and meaning in my life. We have seen in previous chapters that our loved ones are immortal spiritual beings, who have played various roles with us in various life times, in order that we all continue our evolution. Which loved one will we be betraying if we love another, the one from this life or the previous thousand lives? Have we not, then, betrayed our loved ones from previous lives by loving those of this life? How does love betray? Can love be promised to only one aspect of the Divine, or is it for all aspects of the Divine? I am not talking about sex or free sex, but about love, service and unity. Can loving or serving another aspect of the Divine ever betray my loved one who has moved on to another dimension. I would be simply loving and serving another aspect of himself. 11. I have been treated unjustly. 12. I am unlucky. 13. I am the most miserable person I know. Every day 40,000 children die before their parents eyes because they do not have the means to keep them alive. Yesterday 40,000 children. Today 40,000 children. Tomorrow 40,000 children. The day after tomorrow 40,000 children. This week 280,000 parents will see their children die. This month 1,112,000 parents will suffer their children¹s¹ deaths. This year 13,440,000 parents will suffer their children¹s deaths. And next year? And in the 70 years of my life, 938,000,000 parents? And we have ignored all the wars, accidents, suicides etc. of the civilized world. Need I say more? This may not make my pain less. But it must remove the false belief that I am unlucky, or being treated unjustly or am the most miserable person. Yes, I have pain. No one can deny that, But I am not being treated differently than the rest of creation. Life in the physical body is temporary . 14. The other¹s death is a punishment for him or me. 15. I am a sinner, otherwise God would not have punished me in this manner. 16. God does not love me since He allowed my loved one to die. 17. There is no God, otherwise He would not allow my loved one to die. There is no punishment in the universe. There are only lessons. God is love. He gains no pleasure in punishing. We create our evolutionary curriculum, with the Divine as our guidance counselor. It is a shame that we interpret opportunities for growth as punishment. When a student decides to become a doctor, he sets himself up for a number of years of suffering in terms of limited freedom of movement, exhausting hours of study and examinations. He does not interpret these as punishment, for he remembers that he has chosen this and that, in this way, he will develop the qualities he needs in order to be a doctor. It the same way the soul, which has the goal of manifesting its unlimited divine potential here on earth, programs various test and lessons through which it will be able to (or forced to) develop those divine potentials. One of the main tests, is the loss of a loved one. It has nothing to do with punishment, neither for us nor for our loved one. 18. It¹s my fault he died. I could have done something more. We have already mentioned that this thought is in direct violation of the Law of Creation. Each creates his own birth and death. No one else can do this for another. If his or her hour had not come, not even the greatest mass murder in the world could have touched him or her. Every one else would be touched except for him whose hour had not come. We are not in a position to change these events. 19. I did not have the chance to correct my relationship to him (her). I am guilty toward him (her). I was not entirely correct toward him (her). We have already mentioned that we can now correct this relationship by communicating now with our loved one. When we say communicate, we do not mean go to a medium and have a conversation with him. We recommend that this is not a good idea. First of all many «mediums» are not exactly what they say they are. Secondly, we may not be communicating with our loved one , but rather with some low-level spirit which hovers around the earth rather than proceeding in his evolution. Thirdly, we hold our loved one back by such communications. We call his attention towards the earth level. It is totally a different thing to close our eyes and communicate to our loved one during those first days after his departure, and totally another to badger him with mediumistic contacts for years after, because of our inability to let go. Just close your eyes, bring your loved one into your awareness and express your feelings, forgive and ask for forgiveness and then let go and get on with your life. Do this a few times in the beginning and then after a few months if you notice that you still have suppressed feelings. But after a year or so, just let that soul get on with its work, and you with yours. 20. He deserted me. He left me alone. I am sure that no one chooses death as a way of deserting another. We have mutually chosen this event for our mutual spiritual benefit. I repeat that I in no way underestimate the pain and strength of emotions we feel when we lose a loved one. This is totally natural. So do not be offended when I encourage us to move on and to let go. If you are not ready for some of the messages in this chapter or this book, that is perfectly natural. These emotions need time to dissipate. Come back to these pages again after some time, you may perceive them completely differently. ************************************ If you like what you are reading, you willãdefinetly want to get the book Mystical Circle of Life by Robert Elias Najemy, which can be downloaded as an ebook pdf file or ordered from http://HolisticHarmony.com/ebooks/index.asp ******************************** Membership is free and you can access 600 articles, chapters and ebooks for free.Become a Member********* Our Free ezine Claritygreater health, happiness and harmonious relationships. 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