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This is your personal biweekly issue of CLARITY sent to «Field 4» May it find you well and happy. CLARITYThe Psychology of HappinessConcepts for a Happier more Harmonious life Published every 7th and 21st of the month July 7th , 2004 Circulation 2900 Issue # 66 Focus - Fear of Happiness* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Forward or Print and share this with those who will benefit. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * View this and previous issues with greater ease at http://www.holisticharmony.com/clarity/ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Removal instructions are at the end. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * All articles are by Robert Elias Najemy, unless stated otherwise ************************************************* EXTREMELY BENEFICIAL AND INTERESTING MEDIA************************************************* 1. 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Free Teleclasses and lectures as audio files: Download information for free at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/teleclasses/index.asp ************************************************* 7. Free email courses http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/courses/index.asp * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * FEAR OF HAPPINESS* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Robert Elias Najemy http://www.HolisticHarmony.com It is not to be taken for granted that we all want happiness in all parts of our being. Although we all logically may want to be happy, many of us have what might be called inner obstacles, resistance, psychological reversal or secondary gains that prevent us from doing what we need to be happy or accepting it when it is possible. Some of those inner obstacles towards manifesting or accepting happiness are listed below. If you find any of the following familiar, then you will want to work on transforming such beliefs and emotions. We have an abundance of information on how to get free and create happiness at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com Some emotions or beliefs that may cause us to not want to let go of a particular negative emotion. 1. I have felt this way (not happy) a long time and do not know what it will be like to be without this emotion. It will be like losing an important part of myself or of my life. (We have become attached or addicted to feeling this way.) Possible emotions: a. Fear of unknown. b. Fear of being different than I am. c. Fear of not being acceptable to others if I am different than I have been until now. d. Fear of not being accepted by others if I am not like them (unhappy). e. Fear of loneliness if I am happy. 2. I believe that I need this emotion (possibly through anger, depression, injustice, pain) in order to protect myself from others. Possible emotions: a. Fear that others want to hurt or use us and thus we need to protect ourselves with anger, depression of hurt. b. Fear that I do not have any other way of protecting myself. c. Fear of not getting what I want if I let go of this emotion. d. Fear that others will not pay attention to me if I am not angry or crying. 3. I will lose my power or control over others. (Perhaps with anger, depression or dissatisfaction.) Possible emotions: a. Fear that I won’t, in any other way, be able to get what I want from others. b. Fear that if I do not control them, they will control me. c. Fear that I will lose my self-worth (or something else important to me) if I do not control others. 4. I will lose others’ attention if I do not have this emotion. Possible emotions: a. Fear that others will not pay attention to me if I do not have these emotions. b. Fear that I do not have anything worthwhile about myself for others to be interested in. c. Fear that if I do not have others attention, then I will have no self-worth. d. Fear of loneliness. 5. I will lose my self-worth if I do not feel this way. (Especially if we are used to feeling the victim or «righteous anger» in order to get our feelings of goodness, righteousness or self-worth) Possible emotions: a. Fear that I have no self-worth except when I am angry. b. Fear that I have no self-worth except when I am done injustice to. c. Fear that I will not be right if I am not angry or crying. 6. I will allow others to be free from feeling guilty or responsible about me. I will lose control over them. a. Anger towards others for what they have done to me. b. Guilt if the others are not guilty ("someone has to be guilty - if it is not them, then I must be.") Thus the need to be «not well» in order for them to guilt about me. c. Fear of losing control over others. 7. I will need to take responsibility for my life. Possible emotions: a. Fear that I am not capable to handling life on my own. Thus better to be «not well» and thus not be able to try to make it in life. Not trying means not failing. b. Fear of loneliness. 8. In order to be good, I must feel guilty for what I have done. Thus I cannot accept feeling okay. A good person must feel guilty. a. Fear that I will not be a good person, unless I feel guilty and unhappy. (To pay for my sins) b. Feeling that I must punish myself for mistakes I have made. 9. I will need to be happy - something which scares me. Possible emotions: a. Fear that if I am too happy, something bad will then happen. b. Fear that if I do not need others and am happy, I will lose their attention. c. Fear that if I am not a victim, I have no self-worth. d. Fear that I might annoy someone or make them unhappy – perhaps they will feel demeaned of jealous if I am happy e. Fear that others might consider me to be silly or not serious of I express joy. f. Fear that happiness and joy might be against what God wants from me. (Perhaps a lack of respect.) g. Fear that happiness needs always to be balanced with unhappiness. h. Happiness must be obtained by hard work and trials and tribulations. 10. I will have to recognize my self-worth - which also scares me. Possible emotions: a. Fear that if I believe in my self-worth, I will be egotistical and not good or pure. b. Fear that I do not deserve to believe in my self-worth. c. Fear of the power, which comes from believing in myself. 11. I do not deserve (I am not good enough) to be happy. a. Because when I was a child……. (choose some) 1. My parents did not love me… 2. They did not pay attention to me… 3. I was not good in school… 4. They rejected me… 5. They told me I was a bad boy – girl… 6. They abandoned me… 7. They did not fulfill my need… 8. My parents divorced… 9. My parent(s) died… 10. They abused me… 11. They compared me to others… 12. I did not satisfy my parents… Many other possibilities ……that means I am not good and do not deserve happiness (health, harmonious relationships, abundance) 12. Others (you fill in) These lists of beliefs and emotions are not in any way complete and we welcome your suggested additions to: applications@HolisticHarmony.com
More about life coaching at: http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/introholisticcoach.asp http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/coachquestions/index.asp * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *Visit us at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com or subscribe: * You are receiving this biweekly newsletter because you have become a member of the Holistic Harmony Network or you or a friend have requested a subscription for you. To subscribe go to: http://www.holisticharmony.com/smusermanager/login.asp?action=maillist To be removed from our list send us an email to unsubscribe@holisticharmony.com with the word åRemove" as the subject. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * May you be well and happy |
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