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Life Stories and Lessons
Life Story 21 - THE REBEL, THE REVOLUTIONARY, THE ANTAGONIST.
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Jake is a "rebel". He easily feels suppressed and reacts so as to protect his freedom, often from imaginary dangers. He believes that others want to control him and prevent him from doing what he would like to do. When he fears that his freedom is in danger, he can become defensive and aggressive often demeaning or hurting others. He is seldom on time and frequently does not keep his word. Doing so for him would mean, "not being free".

He was, in fact, suppressed in childhood by both parents, and as a result, has now developed this sensitivity.

This has caused his professional life as well as his relationships to suffer. Although, he does not want to push people away, nor does he want to hurt them, his behavior often does so. He is the victim of his own reflex defense mechanisms that function in order to "protect his freedom". He is not able to think about what he is doing or control himself when he gets into these states of "self protection".

His family and friends understand him only to a certain extent and are annoyed by his behavior. Many have ceased to ask anything of him, because he might react angrily, something that they wish to avoid.

He realizes that this is happening, feels badly about it, but cannot change it nor admit it to the others. He also has a tendency to feel easily wronged, in which case he again becomes aggressive and violent to protect his "right".

He tends to be uncooperative and oscillates between being aloof and intimidating those around him.

He and those around him are in a constant state of tension.

Some beliefs that lead Jake to this behavior are:

1. My freedom and rights are in danger.

2: I have to fight for my freedom and justice.

3: I need the others but am in danger from them.

4. Others want to control me.

5. I will lose my freedom, self worth and happiness if I do what others want from me.

6. When others agree with me that I am right, then I am worthy and safe.

7. I am not loved; thus I must protect myself from others.

8. This is a war of control. If I do not fight I will lose my freedom.

9. If I admit that they are right they will use this against me on another occasion.

10. People are hypocrites and are underhanded; I cannot trust them.

Some positive beliefs that will help him, experience his inner peace and ability to cooperate are:

1. I am free to be myself in every situation.

2: I can protect freedom and justice with love and understanding.

3: I am complete in myself and feel totally safe with others.

4. Only I can control myself.

5. I am free to do what my conscience tells me.

6. I am worthy of love and respect regardless of others' opinions.

7. I am loved, and safe with all.

8. My freedom is in my control.

9. The truth creates harmonious relationships of love and respect.

10. All are expressions of the Divine.

Some positive beliefs which will help those around him to deal with him more effectively:

1. Jake behaves in this way, because he is afraid of being controlled or of being wrong.

2. He needs our love and understanding.

3. We do not help him when we allow him to behave in disrespectful ways.

4. We need to love him and accept him while assertively demanding that he behave towards us, as he would like us to behave towards him.

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