Peter lacks self-confidence and self-acceptance and is tired of being compared to his older sisters. He would like to have good grades but trying and not succeeding is unbearable for him. Thus, he prefers not to try at all.

He would much rather play at the computer or search the net, than study subjects that he feels have nothing to do with life. He prefers to partake in activities that he can control and succeed at rather than those which hold the possibility of failure and create anxiety.

John and Barbara attach great importance to grades, success, economic status, and most of all, to how they and their children compare to other families and what others think of them.

They are finding it difficult to decide how much responsibility they have for Peter's future, and whether it is their duty to pressure him and how much. But what creates even more anxiety for them is that they are programmed to believe that his "failure" is their "failure". They measure their self worth as persons and parents by their children's grades and accomplishments.

They are ashamed to admit to others that Peter is not doing well. They feel lessened in other's eyes.

Peter realizes this and is hurt by the fact that they are allowing what other people think to be more important than how he feels. He feels misunderstood, rejected, and unloved. His parents feel the same.

He needs to be accepted and loved as he is regardless of his grades. His parents do love him, but their fears concerning his future, their own self worth as parents and what others think of them, prevent them from being able to express their love.

Peter would like to make them happy, but his fear of failure and need to protect his freedom and self worth by rebelling against their pressure, do not allow him.

They all need to analyze and get free from the beliefs and attachments that are preventing them from experiencing and expressing the love that they have for each other.

1. Our child is our creation. We are totally responsible for what he becomes.

2. Our self worth depends on how he turns out, his grades, his health, his success, his behavior etc.

3. Others will judge us according to our children's success or failure.

4. Our self worth is dependent upon what others think and say about us.

5. Our child will be able to succeed and be happy only of he obtains high grades and a university degree.

6. This is a difficult world and we need to protect and prepare our child for it.

7. Our child might later in life hold us accountable for the fact that we didn't push him enough.

1. I am not smart; I cannot succeed at school.

2. My self worth is dependent on my grades.

3. My self worth is dependent on how I measure up to my sisters and others.

4. My parents love me more if I have high grades and less if I do not.

5. I will probably not make it in life without good grades.

6. I am a failure and no one loves me.

7. I am living in a prison and have no freedom to live my life I as I want to.

8. My parents want to control me in order to satisfy their own needs.

1. Our child is God's creation and has within him the blueprints of his life. We are here to aid him find himself.

2. Our child is like a seed that knows what it needs to become. We are here simply to water the seed and nourish it, not tell him how to live his life.

3. Our self worth depends only on our motives and effort to help our child and not on the result.

4. We are worthy of love and respect regardless of our children's grades.

5. We are worthy of love a respect regardless of what others think or say.

6. Our child has the ability and inner guidance to create success and happiness regardless of his education.

7. Life gives us and our children exactly what each of us needs for his/her growth.

8. We offer our love, guidance and support to our child but allow him to make his own choices and grow through living the results of those choices.

9. I understand and respect my child's fears and seek to help him believe in himself.

1. I am intelligent and totally capable of succeeding at school and life.

2. I deserve love and respect regardless of my grade level.

3. I am unique and different from my sisters.

4.I will create success and happiness in my life.

5. I am worthy of love and respect exactly as I am.

6. I understand my parents' anxiety and need to pressure me to study and feel their love behind those movements.

7. I understand their fears and accept them as they are.

8. Real freedom is the freedom to intelligently direct my energy in ways, which benefit my life and future.

9. My parents love me and are trying to help me in their own way.